The Moment of Sudden Realization & Insight

@Laura I had an aha moment tonight balling my eyes out talking to my godmother. I realized that I hate myself so much I wont let myself work becuase it feels like it will never be good enough.

My aha moment was when I read this:

Overthinking - the art of creating problems that weren't even there.

I tend to overthink every aspect of my life way too much and reading the above just helped me to realise that I need to stop tiring myself out so much emotionally by overthinking.

Overthinking makes us depressed as we end up thinking so many things - like - what if? how? why? when?

Go with the flow - that's what I'm trying to do now.

I don't want to break my own heart by overthinking each scenario, each text, every touch and look.

@Laura hello! Today I had an Aha! moment in the shower. I realized exactly when my first panic attack took place and how I felt, and then I compared it with other panic attacks I've had. I know it doesn't sound that great, but I've been trying to understand exactly why I developed anxiety and when it started getting this bad, so remembering the start of it all feels like I'm onto something. :) Have a wonderful day everybody!

Mom just stopped by and gave me an early birthday gift, a beautiful shirt, and 2 night shirts

it was a nice surprise,

This is probably out of context, but I have several aha moments pertaining to my mental and physical health, but the recent aha! Momment that came for me was when I was attempting to clean my room and I was organizing my books from my past schooling and I came to a sudden realization: since I started post secondary education, I had literally dropped out or kicked out the programs and I truly didn't know why was this happening to me. One of the factors was my mom pressuring me to attempt nursing which I really don't want. But from 2014-2015 I was in an intense year long program for medical technician and personal support worker and I thought maybe I can be a nurse after all! And I was literally looking over different schools to start. A few months past, and I'm here in my room cleaning, and the revelation came to me: I can't be a nurse-not due to my intelligence or me simply hating it. I'm sure there many reasons people chose nursing, but I feel like you at least have to have thick skin and empathy. But the real reason I was considering nursing was due that I'll be back to school and back to learning. Studying! I love to learn new things and use the knowledge in many situations and going to the nursing program will be another gateway to getting knowledge. But what will happen if I actually do it and complete the program? Then I'll actually have to do nurse stuff...so that's my aha moment- because at this point I truly don't know what I really want.

My ahha moment was when I finally realized that even though my mother hurt me throughout my childhood and did a lot of damage she really did the best she could with what she had. Her life was filled with addiction abuse and refusal to take care of herself. She didn't meet my standards of what a mother should be but maybe she was only capable of what she gave to me and to her that was trying her best. We all tell people to try their best and that is what she did. It fell short and caused pain on my end but she put her best in. I forgive her for that reason.

Feeling crappy all the time isn't normal

I was actually searching online for people to ask them the various ways to commit suicide, so that i could do it in the next two or three days. I felt competelely hopeless and thought this was it for me. That is when I discovered 7cupsoftea and now I think i am changing for the better. I don't know if it classifies as a AHA moment for anyone, but it sure did for me. :) :) :)

A month entry when I realized my whole life has been a lie, an nothing really is so important that I really matter anymore. Life goes on with or without me. I just don't matter.

My aha moment came when I realized I do not have to join in the arguments, or welcome "their" circus into my life. They're their monkey's, not mine... And they can keep them.

It's not always about me.