A message to someone

I wish I haven't met you. For the first time of my life, I say this to you, someone I loved unconditionally, and fought for untill the last second, while all I got from you was sheer mental torture. I don't want you to get near me again. I know you've hurted me, and you never cared. But I still miss you, because I loved you. It wasn't healthy, it wasn't good. But just being with you. As toxic and painful as it was.I loved being with you. To be yours, and to call you mine. I really wish that I never met you. Never gave you another chance when you did something as horrible as cheating, which was the one thing you kept warning me from. I still gave you a chance. Because I loved you. I trusted you more than anyone else in my lonely miserable life. Listened to you everyday, comforted you, I was always there for you, even when you only brought me pain, and never tried for me at all. But you ended up pushing me away. And abandoned me like trash. I hate what you've done to me. But I can never hate you. It's my curse.The curse that will follow me untill my end. If I was selfish, I would have never attempted to understand you. But well.. I can't take it back now. I wish you never happened. You're gonna stay in my memories, as the person who hurted me. The girl with the beautiful emerald green eyes, the thick and pretty ginger hair. The smile I loved to see. But you never loved me. You never did. If you were to come here and say the magic words, that you're sorry. The old me would have given you a chance. But even if you came to me, changed for me, became my perfect girl. I'll never let you in my life again.Never, on my dead body. I don't know if I want you to forget me, or think and regret the pain you caused me. But either way. As I told you a million times before. I loved you with all your flaws, I always did.If I didn't love you unconditionally, we wouldn't have lasted even a single week. Because I lied to myself that you were good for me. But you're not. I loved you selflessly.I don't know if I'll ever recover from you, but I'll try. I can't even bring myself to say "Bye", because I can just talk all night about what to say to you, the weight on my chest is too heavy, I can never express it enough. But you don't deserve any more of my time than this. So yeah. Bye, and never come back again. My choco.