Sad and angry
I lost my dad to suicide march 25 2025 and i am still not ok I feel like I am just existing pushing through every day miserable . Idk if im still grieving or what’s going on I feel like my life is ruined and it’s never going to get better . I wake up every morning mad and angry I am sad throughout the day I am angry at everyone for no reason . I am just always in a bad mood . I don’t like my life now there is no joy and happiness in my life anymore and I don’t know how to get it back . Yes I love my kids and they make me happy but I just want to have a happy life again. I don’t like listening to music anymore I don’t like going out anymore I don’t want to live in this house anymore . I always have anxiety and I’m just scared I will never be happy again. I don’t even have interest in riding my Motorcycle anymore which is very disturbing because I used to ride it every day.
Everything just sucks now
@kawasakiKRT400rr
🥺
I'm sorry it also robbed you of your passions!
Grief is heartbreaking!
Relentless!
If there was a timeline, it'd be great but sadly there's not!
There are so many stages we need to work through!
We never get over it but we just learn to live in it and with it.
Its hard for you, the what ifs, the lack of closure, the horror and suddenness of it.
It's like your world stop spinning overnight yet everyone else is still living.
You are stuck!
Like groundhog day!
I really see you and hear you!
I know, it feels like it will never, ever get better!
But one day at a time, is all you can do!
Sending you my love 💜💕
@amanda84
Yes it’s terrible . I don’t like this house anymore either tonight I came home from back to school night and my whole garage was flooded idk why . Ever since my dad moved In and passed away it seems like nothing but bad things have been happening here . I don’t want to say my house is cursed I just keep my hope and faith in the Lord and pray everything will be okay ❤️
@kawasakiKRT400rr
It's just one more thing that you didn't need to happen! 💜 Sending you my prayers!
@kawasakiKRT400rr I’m so sorry for your loss. Losing your dad in this way is heartbreaking and deeply unfair, and it makes complete sense that you’re angry, sad, and feeling like life has lost its joy. Grief—especially from suicide—can bring up so many heavy emotions all at once: confusion, anger, despair, numbness. None of these feelings mean you’re failing or that you’ll always feel this way—they’re part of the painful process your heart and mind are trying to work through.
Right now it probably feels like you’re just surviving day to day, and that’s okay. Sometimes “just existing” is what grief looks like in the beginning. The fact that you love your kids and that they bring you some light is important—it shows that even in the darkness, there are threads of love keeping you connected here.
Please know this won’t always feel as raw as it does right now. Healing doesn’t mean forgetting or “moving on”—it means slowly finding ways to carry this loss while making room for new moments of peace and meaning. It takes time, and it often takes help. If you can, reaching out to a grief counselor or joining a support group for suicide loss survivors can give you a safe space where people truly understand this kind of pain.
For now, be gentle with yourself. You don’t need to force joy or go back to how things were right away. Just focus on small steps: resting when you can, talking when you need to, even allowing yourself moments of quiet without judgment. You are not broken—you’re grieving something unimaginably hard. And over time, even if it feels impossible right now, the weight can become lighter to carry.
You don’t have to go through this alone.
@emotionalnickel5958
Thank you so much for your kind words, yes it’s very hard and I am always angry it stinks . I am praying I don’t always feel this way . Yes I do feel like I am just existing and it feels awful . I do love my kids very much that’s what keeps me somewhat going . I feel broken I guess I haven’t ever grieved before even tho I have lost people . I hope things get easier soon cause this is really hard and depressing. I feel alone and sad all the time .
❤️ Suicide is very heartbreaking. Being angry at everyone sounds difficult. Your kids will see it also. I am guessing your dad is thier grandfather? Sometimes suicide does Not have signs, because nothing is "always true". I want to send you a big squeezable virtual hug. Big squeeze! You are loved you are worthy you are smart you are loved. If you believe in heaven then think of your dad in a pkace where he is now without worry or the pain inside his head. Yes he went sooner than later but think of him as loving yall from a distance. Try to relearn to like one thing at a time like breakfast, long walks, taking kids to park so on. Try to pick either joy or happiness one emotion at a time. Since you are a parent then be the new matriarch/ patriarch for them. Ask them if they understand and how are they coping---it may sound counterintuitive but it will work in time. Give your body, mind, and soul time to heal. Much love and my deepest sympathies
@caramellove118
My kids don’t know he committed suicide. They just think he passed away. Yes it was their grandfather but they didn’t really bond . My dad wasn’t the easiest person to get along with . Thank you for your hug . I hope he loves me and doesn’t blame me maybe I didn’t do enough idk. It seems like it’s taking so long to get better and heal . Much love to you as well and thank you so much
Aww you are welcome you need a hug. Keep taking the time to breath little by little. Grief however long it takes and try not to overthink. Just give you and your family the right to heal. God Bless❤️🩹
@caramellove118
Thank you! I am trying . It just sucks and I always overthink everything . God bless you as well ❤️ thank you.
I’m sorry are you going to be ok
I’m sorry are you going to be ok
