my first love
I broke up with my first love a year ago and still can't let him go. I miss him very much, but I know that he's doing well right now, he's actively looking girls, and he doesn't need me. I feel like crying all the time, I miss him as a person. He was the only person who really suited me as my soulmate.
@sofka
Hello,
Breakups are really rough. Having to grieve and let go of a person who is still alive is a so so hard. Its valid to need time to be over it, esp considering it was your first love. And I can understand the sadness that comes with knowing they are moving on and onwards, when you are still stuck on the cycle. The fear of not finding someone whom you can connect with to that level is very understandable too.
You don't need to follow a timeline and can absolutely take your time to process things. I was wondering, if anything in particular is making it harder for you in the process of healing?
Sending you lots of strength. One day, someone who is well suited and more importantly, stick with you through everything will show up. Till then, is there some ways you can be there for yourself? 💙
@River
hello, I do not know what complicates the process for me, these thoughts about him somehow appear in my head, not because of circumstances.
@sofka
Thats valid too. I am dealing with a breakup of mine in recent times, and my best friend always tells me that "It gets easier and one day, you will wake up and the memories won't be painful anymore." I hope for the same for you.
I am here to listen and get updates if you ever want to share. I hope your day was well. 🤍
@River
And thank you so much for your support and understanding 🙏🏼
@sofka I understand. Two years ago my boyfriend put me down, but he still wanted to be able to sleep with me. I declined. The relationship drained me anyway; while he walked away with his cup overflowing. He would reach out to me off and on but he was still never sincere. Had he come to me with sincerity I would have folded like a lawn chair. He never did. The only way he could have reached me was through sincerity. Anyway he called me out of the blue a few months ago to tell me he was in love with someone. We hadn't been together in two years and barely communicated. I didn't understand the purpose of calling me, but I was glad in a way so I would quit hoping one day he would actually SEE ME. I know he never will, but hope springs eternal. Anyway, he still wanted to sleep with me even though he's with someone else but I'm not doing that. I'd rather wait for someone who actually cares for me. It's just bad that I don't really meet people who do, and I'm not a person who dates simply because I get lonely. I'm introverted though, and very distrustful, so I barely meet people. But I was with him for over a decade and completely head over hills. I'm still sad about how it turned out but I refuse to let him hurt me one more day. I just don't think I'll ever meet anyone who will actually care, so I've accepted a life of solitude. I don't even want cats.
@sociableBeechwood9106
I'm really sorry that you have this situation with your ex-boyfriend. I'm sure you'll find your man yet. The most important thing is to be brave and not be afraid of new acquaintances. I've met a lot of people now, and it's helped me get distracted.
@sofka probably I won't but that's ok; I'm more used to my own company anyway but I get it, a girl can always dream, right? 🥰
But he called me today from both phones. I keep him blocked but my phone still shows me the missed calls. I wanted to call back but as the day progresses I'm thinking about it less and less: thanks to sleep deprivation. 👌🏾
