Confession
[This thread was submitted to be a featured thread by the general support community. If you have a thread you'd like to be featured, please submit it here!]
I sometimes resent my family for keeping me alive.
Sometimes when my depression comes, I feel like I'm worthless I feel like nobody wants to be near or next to me, I feel more insecure and I would want to be invisible just for a day. So nobody would even care if I cry. I'm sorry if this is too sad but this is how I feel when that depression comes. Thank you for listening.
I relapsed.
No matter what I do in life, I don't think I will ever be good enough for myself. I'm always indifferent about my successes and brutal on my failures and I'm in complete fear that this will always be the case.
@FantasiaSweetShock same with me. Sometimes after I be so critical of myself, I think, would anyone actually say that to me? The answer is no, so why not treat myself how others treat me or how I would treat others, hope that helps.
@reservedexcitment Thanks...this is actually something I've been trying to work on for the last couple of months and while it is getting better there are moments where I slip and start criticizing myself
@FantasiaSweetShock im EXACTLY the same
@FantasiaSweetShock
It doesn't have to be that way forever, there's tonnes of books like Jack Canfield's the sucess principles, the Four Agreements- Toletec wisdom and PISA program. You cam break through that mindset and be a happy go lucky, easy you!
I don't want my life to get better becuase than I will be expected to be happy and cheering and interacting with people all the time. I would rather be left alone.
I suffer from bipolar disorder and I'm too scared to go get treated or tell anyone about it
Finding someone to talk to is critical. There are lots of caring people who want to help.@FarahQ
@FarahQ See a doctor and get help. It works. I am also BP, and takings meds has helped
I want to kill myself
But you are loved. You are special. You bring unique gifts to the world.@jkathryn
It is time to reach out and find someone to talk to@bestVase7265
@jkathryn I was once told from a medical researcher in suicide studies, that thoughts of suicide are the body's alarm system that things in life are getting overwhelming. So it's not something to freak out by, but rather understand it for what it is, it's an alarm bell, meaning something needs changing, does not mean that is what you want to do. Could you be overwhelmed and find solutions to things ( such as internal pain, feeling stuck in life, being alone, doubting worth, too exhausted, too many road blocks in life etc.)? I found that to be true for me. Could that be it for you?
@jkathryn
@jkathryn you are of value and use to someone! Please think of those that benifit from all that you do! You are valuable and useful. :)
Cheer up buttercup! Hold on tight, This too shall pass.
When people are too stubborn to see things in another way.
Absolutely ticks me off.
I'm not handling things very well. I'm just generally terrified of my own mind and what would happen if I talked about it. We don't talk about our problems very often, or very easily, especially when we're not sure what's wrong. Either way, I certainly don't have any positive reactions to this emotional turmoil...
@thelonesomerider
Would you be okay with telling us what's wrong since it wouldn't be actual talking.
@impartialTree3773 There's a lot, really. My mind is a very dark and violent place. Of course, I'm coming to understand one of the aspects of it (whether that aspect is good or bad is dependant upon the aspect itself, which I'm not going in to right now).
My therapist made me do sexual things with them.
@AffablePanda18
That's unethical and very likely criminal due to his/her position of trust with you. File a report with his/her state licensing board NOW, and change therapists ASAP. Rape occurs when one is being coerced (physically, emotionally, etc) to have sex- esp if you do not have appropriate romantic or sexual feelings toward that person. Someone pointed to an article about asking for sex is like asking a person to make/have a cup of tea. Sometimes people just don't want to or can't rationally make/have a cup of tea with you at that time. Very interesting take on it.
@AffablePanda18
I've recently found out I have maladaptive daydreaming disorder and I've never felt so relieved in my life. In still haven't told anyone but I'm craving to find someone who shares the same disorder as me.
@karefare123 I haven't been diagnosed with MDD but I'm pretty close to all the symptoms. I feel like its such an embarrassing disorder to have because it meant for me that I was happy literally doing nothing but living in my head.
I really get how enjoyable it is. Once I started daydreaming of a better life the harder it was to return myself to my life of isolation and depression. The only way to not feel such shame about it is to tell someone about it. So go ahead and share now.
@Nairhair95 Have you told anyone about it? If so, how'd they react? How'd you tell them?
