In The Gloaming TW *just in case*
With the tragic loss of the feed and after much debate and discussion. It's been decided to create a new thread. Soul space so to speak. A journal of sorts.
A place where I can dump some of the nonsense that goes on in my head.
While replies are welcome - they aren't necessary.
happy new year Soul friend 💙 *lots of hugs and love* haven't seen you around in a while. Hope you’re okay. 💙 thinking about you.
@LoveMyMoonflowers Thank you Moon Pie 💙 Happy New Year to you too! I hope you're doing alright too
We were all wondering where you went, man...
@slowdecline48 I slipped and fell into the pit of misery
S***. That's all too familiar...to a lot of us on Cups, I think...
@mytwistedsoul I’m going to take a risk and make a bad Mario Kart joke on your thread.
I’m so sorry I threw that banana peel at you Twist! 😮
I’m so glad the little cloud guy brought you back from the pit of misery though! 😇
@PiecesOfWhoeverIWas 😂 So that's what happened! Damn those banana peels! (Shakes fist) 😂
@slowdecline48 These random banana peels just keep showing up out of thin air! 😮
@mytwistedsoul
@LoveMyMoonflowers (looks around suspiciously) watch out Moon Pie we've got random banana peels 😳
Thank you 💙
in still, quiet places
there's a voice
some times it whispers
other times it cries or sings
like waves
that break on ocean shores
shifting all the pieces
all the pieces that are me
the pieces of me, the parts of you
the particles of we
endless shifting of time and space
united in one breath
the beat of their heart echoes mine
a rhythm that moves in every thing living
could this voice that speaks in me
be a code or a key?
for a door that doesn't exist
cautious and unsure....
what do any of us know?
so much... but yet nothing...
if we're honest with ourselves
all these painful memories
the short ones and long-lasting streams
just dust and rust and bits of debris
if i stand at the cliff in my mind
it cries out in fear
"if you jump, you'll d.ie"
these swirling thoughts
like leaves on the wind
dance...and sing
but what happens
if you dive deep within?
face the guardian demons
that hold the souls in chains
by the beliefs, standards, ideals
and other fear games
can we stop for a moment...
rest from all these thoughts
let things "be"...as it is...
falling again
the doubts started crawling in
my wings got twisted
despair and disappointment
there are no answers
mind games...
loneliness and sadness
these constant companions
are so demanding
tired of ourselves,
the constant fighting
illusionary symbols
pretended sharing
if you give, we give
we are more and you are less
defining the rules
only some are useful ...
maybe that's really true
all we believe in
is just passing through
so many stories
all kinds...
we need to let them go...
along with wanting to know
what, where and why
they gave her names
separating her by invisible lines
while…
she is whole and undivided
a soul... ageless
it’s effortless to di.e...knowing
we could be born again
without dying...
each dawn we're born
every night we di.e...
it dissolves any who, what or why
I'm a man...and a boy
a wolf... lamb and a child
clouds and a deep sky...
a pebble in a stream
a wave whispering to a shore
as sun is setting
the gentle breeze caresses skin
senses are resting
calmness...is here
in this space...
I exist
You are truly the most profoundly poetic slice of white bread I've ever seen...
(Okay, I'll see myself out)
@slowdecline48 Thanks 😂
If I said it was cold outside that would be an understatement. It is currently -12 this morning. Which is actually warmer than it was at midnight with the wind chills at -21. Damn polar vortex!
@mytwistedsoul I hear that.
It hasn't been that cold down here in Floridastan but it's cold enough. Right now it's 2°C outside... Yesterday, Pensacola got 7 in. of snow. That is unheard-of here. Some of the natives were freaking out. Am not native myself but I kinda get it...if you've grown up in a place where there's no real winter, then it will be a shock.
Guess we'll have to learn northerner skills now: insulating the plumbing, equipping municipal vehicles with snowplow blades on the front, etc
@slowdecline48 I had seen the south was going to get snow! 7 inches of snow must have been a shock for a few people! Does anyone in Florida even own a snow shovel?
Up til now, no. 😏
I bet a few people bought snow shovels off Amazon since Pensacola & Tallahassee got snowed, though.
@slowdecline48 I bet Amazon had a major influx of snow shovel orders! I did see some videos from there and they had a bridge closed. Georgia sent some equipment to help you all out though didn't they?
@mytwistedsoul Maybe, I dunno...haven't kept up with the news much since that day. Too much to do, or too tired to care.
Tried to post a few things earlier but kept getting an error code. Decided trying to have a little fun wasn't worth the headache
Cooper's hawk
@mytwistedsoul Nice shot.
Rather a privilege to have such a bird perch outside one's window, eh?... Didn't know there was such a species. Until now, the only Cooper's hawk I was aware of was the fancy restaurant chain. 😂 (Never been to one)
@slowdecline48 Thanks! It was pretty awesome to see. Tbh I never knew there was a restaurant with the name. It's all just been a bird lol
@mytwistedsoul Wow, fabulous! I adore it when you catch wildlife just outside your window. There's somethings special about breaking from your usual modus operandi - shattering the norms of your day - to take time to watch them and their ways in the world.
@MelancholicMage Hi! Omgosh there's always something here to watch lol! (Probably why I don't get as much done as I should during the day) The squirrels are probably the funniest but the deer are pretty cool too
@mytwistedsoul Oh wow! It's so close! It's so lovely, I wish I could see critters more often. I certainly see a bit more wildlife compared to where I came from, though. Even seeing a garden bird or two potter around outside the window makes me smile.
@MelancholicMage Maybe a birdfeeder or two would help draw in more critters? It would almost definitely bring in squirrels lol! They're always looking for stuff to get into. Plus it would bring in all kinds of birds 😊
Just make sure you don't mount this birdhouse directly above your usual parking space...
@slowdecline48 😂 good point but they like to sit at the side mirrors and make a mess that way and good god don't leave the windows open or they fly back and forth. There's usually a "presents" on the steering wheel 😬 lesson learned lol
Yesterday morning there were visitors I hadn't seen in a while
we shatter, into pieces,
turn pain into poetry.
carved names into skin
fight the battles, didn't die
but never seemed to win.
struggle through the pain,
find the strength, break the chains,
rise and shine
turn the darkness into light.
we were broken, lost to the shadows,
fought wars in silent battles,
we fell deeper and lost our way,
through echoes of past days,
every whisper, every doubt
every lash, every burn,
every scar that we earn
consider it a lesson learned.
chains can't hold us,
even though fear remains,
let fear and anger fuel the flames,
build a legend to be told
spark a fire in your soul
look at all chaos,
stand tall in the fight,
we may fall but we will survive.
every tear, every bruise, every drop of blood,
built the warriors standing here.
@slowdecline48 We need theme music 😂
@mytwistedsoul
@amiableBunny4016
@mytwistedsoul I hope you dabble in poetry more often. While it was hard to read knowing it came from a place that had more pain than not, I feel like I know you better from it and can be more supportive as a result. x
@MelancholicMage Every now and again poems are posted here. They can be pretty cathartic. Do you write poems?
@mytwistedsoul like the phoenix rising from the ashes. ❤️
@PiecesOfWhoeverIWas Yes! 😊
(although sometimes ... I think they should have called them molotov cockatiels instead) 😅😂
@mytwistedsoul 😂😂😂 Did you make that up? That’s hilarious!
@PiecesOfWhoeverIWas I think I saw it somewhere. That gif is pure perfection though! 😂😂
It must be the latest covert atomic bomb design by the guys in DARPA...
@slowdecline48 You mean the Defense Aviary Research Projects Agency? Yes. Be careful when you see a bird perched over your car!
@PiecesOfWhoeverIWas That's the first bird I've ever seen with plutonium inside it & a detonator in its head!...
Inspiration of the day: Don't become coyote chow 😂😂
@mytwistedsoul I need to know what coyote chow is lol
I just googled… 🤣
@LoveMyMoonflowers 😁😂😂
@LoveMyMoonflowers It's what I thought about becoming in one of those moments when life is so difficult, you wonder whether it's worth the trouble to keep going... Also thought about becoming vulture food & gator bait at the same time.
@slowdecline48 Nope nope nope. No alligators or snakes. If I have a heart attack it'll be because of a snake 😳 An alligator would be a horrible way to go
@mytwistedsoul you reminded me of this.
@PiecesOfWhoeverIWas 😂😂 Yep! Why did it have to be snakes? 😅😅
@mytwistedsoul I take it you'll be less than enthusiastic that of all the pets I owned when I was a kid, one of my two favorites was Stretch...my gopher snake.
He was great at removing unwanted visitors from the house. Not that he was fierce--he wasn't--but Stretch, like all of his kind, moved around without legs, was very quiet & had an unexpressive face. That creeps out a lot of people 😂
@slowdecline48 I have to admit I can't stand snakes 😅 Childhood fear unlocked. They're fine as long as they're away from me lol. I think they're neat in their own slithery way but yeah that's a hard no (as I'm sitting here shaking my head no as I type this) 😅😂 Although last year there was 2 gardener snakes in the greenhouse and they were alright as long as I knew where they were. Which was usually in an empty flower pot on the counter in the sun. Stretch 😂 that's a good name for a snake!
@PiecesOfWhoeverIWas Ahh yes, back in the day...when Indiana Jones was an actual leading man. Back before Harrison Ford starred in that last turkey of a movie, ruining his legacy.
Almost couldn't find this place. Some areas of the site seem a wee bit glitchy. (as usual) Thought I'd share the adventure that was had with the neighbor yesterday (since I can't seem to find the motivation to get my a** off the couch). A ride was needed to the garage yesterday to pick up the Beast. (Inspection) The neighbor offered to drop me off. The drive there went fine but .... The moment she hit the entrance it went down hill. For some reason she made a sharp right turn and ran over the curb with both passenger side tires. She hit it so hard the front tire totally blew out. The back tire wasn't as bad but as soon as you got out of the car a steady ppsss could be heard. They heard her hit the curb inside the garage it was that loud. Had she just went straight and parked in front this wouldn't have happened. I think my first words were "Holy sh*t Mae what the f**k did you just hit?" She was p*ssed and I feel bad about it. She needed 2 new tires (obviously) the garage hooked her up and checked the underneath to make sure nothing else was damaged (thankfully nothing was) I waited with her while they put the new tires on and offered to pay for them. Which she refused but I have to admit I feel really guilty because had I not asked her to drop me off this wouldn't have happened. Needless to say, it's doubtful I'll ask again for a ride from her and it's made me start to question her abilities (she's started to repeat herself in conversations). It sits in the pit of my stomach and gives an uneasy feeling because I've seen this before. Her husband is aware that this happened because I called to let him know it was going to take a bit longer than expected. I followed her home because I was concerned about her being on her own
@mytwistedsoul Well that trip wasn't cool...
I presume this neighbor lady is advanced in her years. If so then, yeah... Elderly drivers are a serious problem down here in Floridastan. Back when I rode a motorcycle, one day I saw the aftermath of an accident where some 85-year-old fossil took a left turn at the wrong time & hit a guy on one of those sport bikes...Kawasaki or something like that. When I got there he was lying on the sidewalk... another biker had stopped & moved him there. Poor fella never made it to the emergency room.
I got my diagnosis that year...sold the Suzuki not too long afterward.
@slowdecline48 She is. You presumed correct. Oh damn I forgot that Florida is the holy lands for senior citizens. That poor rider never stood a chance 😞
@mytwistedsoul It’s a scary situation riding with someone whose reflexes and judgment are impaired. I can understand why you reacted that way. I’m sure she was a combination of embarrassed and frustrated with herself. Losing control of yourself especially if you’ve been really independent, I’m not looking forward to that. You did all the right things, offering to pay, waiting with her, following her home, calling her husband. I understand why you feel bad. Maybe this was a minor incident that was big enough to be a wake up call for them, know what I mean? Especially when you’re noticing some cognitive changes. Like a blessing in disguise before something worse happens like in Slow’s example.
@PiecesOfWhoeverIWas You're right. This may have been a good wake up call for the both of them. Thank you, I was hoping I was making all the right choices with this. It seemed to be the gentlemanly thing to do.
Oh my yes, I hate to think how it will affect her to lose her independence. She's fond of shopping and I've often heard her tell her husband "Fine, I'll go by myself!" But she would be beyond devastated if something happened like what Slow witnessed.
While I'm not expecting anything--if you like to keep your affairs private then I totally understand--now I'm curious about the Beast. What kinda vehicle are we talking about here? Did you modify it at all?...am wondering what it looks like.
@slowdecline48 I don't mind posting pics.
Although I was thinking how funny it would be if I posted a picture of a smart car or something little 😂
https://imgur.com/a/OYiUaFw the link's safe. You have my word on that
oh f*** yeahhh... That is a nice sled, right there. 👌🏼 Looks like one of those Mustangs from, what...the late 2000's? Early 2010's? What kinda powerplant has she got? I'll bet you have fun drivin' in that!
You have excellent taste in automobiles, sir.
The one thing my vehicle has in common with yours is the color. Belay that. I imagine the engine sizes aren't too far apart either. (My truck has a 5.4L V-8...it eats fuel like Ronald Reagan was still president, but it's got power to haul stuff & driving can be fun)
@slowdecline48 Thanks! 😁 It's a 2014 Challenger R/T. My father signed it over to me before he passed. He asked if I wanted it. I laughed and said sure lol. It's got 5.7L hemi V8 pushes between 375 - 395 hp. It's not really practical around these parts but then I drove it a few times. Omg the beast is awesome 😎 I probably have more fun with it than I should 😅 It's hard on gas too but so is my truck lol. I used to have an old Chevy but it finally conked out
Hello twistedsoul, sorry it has been a long gap time to just even write something. I hope you been staying strong despite the tough situations faced. (Sorry... I didn't thoroughly read through your posts... But sometime back I remembered reading some difficult stuffs you been through)
Anyways no matter what don't lose hope and keep staying positive.
@mikenai Hi Mike. It's nice to see you. It has been a while. Thanks, I hope things have gotten better for you
Hello~
Well... I wouldn't say better. It's more or less the same. The usual habits and... endless torments haha.
@mikenai I'm really sorry to hear that Mike. I kept hoping that you had taken control of the things that were controlling you. Change can be so hard to achieve and it's also a little scary. You deserve good things and a life full of love and happiness.
it's ok. Don't be. Ain't anyone's nor your's fault. Since I started it all myself. Well.. thou I wished things were better that slight bit but it's just one after another. Definitely scary when anything else than what's known is. What's next or... Nothing is still a question for me.
