my journal: various subjects, opinionating, CW at times
The title explains itself.
If you're interested in the ramblings of a middle-aged man with chronic conditions who, at times, sees things a little too clearly for his own good, then read on.
Sometimes I get political, but it won't be all the time.
I don't mind comments in general but if you're going to differ with what I write, that's fine--as long as you can explain your position clearly & reasonably. Rants, shouting & general incoherence will be ignored or flagged, depending on the situation. Try to remember that not everyone else in this world holds your beliefs.
Every so often I may post art or snapshots of projects I'm working on.
If you're still interested after reading all the above, great. (I do wonder at how much time you have on your hands, though)
[cw: pol]
"Fake It Til You Make It: The 2025 American Version"
Happy 12th Birthday Cups-Land, etc.
(I'm not big on birthdays...older people know what's up)
Now that that's out of the way, here's a snapshot of my rock pile. Added the few pieces left at the gas station/convenience store this afternoon, & neatened it up a bit...
Gotta say I'm kinda proud of it. By now it's almost as tall as me...was less than half its present size almost three weeks ago.
The concrete wouldn't be here if it weren't for my sweat, toil, & keeping an eye out for opportunities. Any jobsite with waste that can be put to use is an opportunity.
@slowdecline48 Hey that's great Slow! Those are nice sized chunks too!
@mytwistedsoul Thanks! Some of 'em, though... 🥵
Whoever invented the modern sledgehammer--it had to have been before the 20th century--had no idea what a favor he did for so many people. If I hadn't knocked apart a few of those first, I would barely have been able to lift them! How do concrete guys do what they do all f***ing day long?...
@slowdecline48 I bet! That's some hard work right there! You did good though! Concrete is a b**ch to deal with. It's not a job I would want that's for sure
Am feeling kinda glum right now...it started last night. Things on my mind that don't serve any constructive purpose by being there, but they're there anyway.
*sigh*
@slowdecline48 You're welcome to share if you'd like. No pressure or anything. I'm sorry you're feeling this way, it sucks when it hits
I appreciate the thoughts. I haven't decided...at some point, most likely I'll post something.
@slowdecline48 No problem! Sending you good vibes
@slowdecline48 * sigh received 8.... *sighs back *
It’s wild how thoughts can camp out in your head uninvited, offering nothing useful yet refusing to leave. You know they’re not helping but they’re still there... It’s okay to feel glum. Not everything needs to be productive or constructive right away. Sometimes feelings just need space to pass through without being forced into usefulness.
So....* sending good vibes*
@azurePond Thanks. Who's the blonde in the GIF? She's not Barbara Eden, I remember that much...
@slowdecline48 I don't know... Typed ‘good vibes"... found a random gif and boom—sent it your way without thinking. It is the message of the gif that counts, the people in it doesnt matter🤷♀️
@azurePond All righty then...
...
😏
@slowdecline48 Dude.... The eyebrows 😂 perpetually 😳 😂
@mytwistedsoul Have you ever heard of Pink Flamingos? If not...look it up if you want. I'm not gonna go into details here because Cups rules. Let's just say it is one of the more notorious movies in the history of American cinema. 😏
@slowdecline48 Elizabeth Montgomery I think?
I'll have to look her up, thanks.
Gotta wonder what it means when you start having deja vu while you're dreaming... Is my creativity running low? Am I scraping the bottom of the barrel now?...
@slowdecline48 I don’t know... but one time I had a dream I didn’t like so I literally changed the whole premise mid-dream😂 Try doing that!
@azurePond Isn't there a word for that?..."lucid dreaming" or something along those lines?
@slowdecline48 Yep lucid dreaming. Not something I do often — I’m not a pro and I’m definitely not a dru.ggie. It just happened that one time.
Bored.
😒
Got stuff to do, of course, but that's always the case. Now it's after 9 p.m. & I have no lights at this time, so... Bored.
Woke up with my corpse face...that's how tired I am.
Edit: You can relieve boredom by occasionally messing with partisan fools online. 😏
"A Boundless Threat" (UK organized crime)
The night life...
May not be the right life...
But it was once my life.
ooo
(With a tip o' the hat to Willie Nelson)
I hate chronic illness...I hate being tired & I hate sleep deprivation. I also am starting to hate summer.
Yes, I know...a senseless attitude for someone living in FL. But I only moved here because of allergies & my main condition. If it hadn't been for those I'd still be in central TX...though probably not Austin by now. Small-town life is alright...not great. But okay.
I still hate chronic s*** & tiredness.
@slowdecline48 Idk I'm starting to hate summer too. It's so damn hot and humid all the freaking time! I don't remember it being this bad before. I was in Texas once. There were a lot of feed lots for steers that's about all I remember 😅
@mytwistedsoul Anthropogenic climate change...ain't it wonderful. The last time I talked to my cousin in the northeast, he told me the winters up there don't get quite as many days of snow & ice as when he was younger...& he's in his mid-50's.
@slowdecline48 I've noticed that the last 2 winters too. We used to get feet of snow and now it's just nuisance snows. I'd almost rather have the feet of snow. And we didn't have this freaking humidity. I'm not used to it 😬
It looks like you don't have to go where I am...Florida is coming to you.
The day someone in your town finds a swamp puppy* in his pool is when you'll know it's too late.
*FL slang for baby alligator.
[cw: adult subjects, decadence]
Not much to write about today...that's what it feels like, anyway. My weather app gave a heat advisory today for the 2nd day in a row. No surprise since 1) this is Floridastan & 2) right now it's July. Am staying indoors during the day as much as I can.
My left big toe is almost healed up now, I believe...it might always be a bit sensitive to frontal impacts, who knows. If I ever have to kick in combat, I'll have to remember to only do it when in appropriate footwear. My work boots should do.
@unassumingEyes the inbox said you discovered my weed story...hope it was entertaining. I've met some strange characters in my life so far....admittedly I can't talk too much since plenty of people have called me "weird", an "odd duck" or some equivalent term. I stopped worrying about it a while back.😏
...I suspect I'm somewhat in midlife crisis mode, or maybe I'm just becoming corrupt in my old age....I know I need to get more sleep somehow, but I still feel the urge for fun with women of dubious morals. Would experiment with psychedelics if it were possible to obtain them safely....Even so, there are still lines I don't cross. If I were a married man I'd never seriously consider the first option. It's one thing if your wife is freaky &/or likes to party...as long as you & she are honest with each other & respect relationship boundaries, it can work. There are couples into "alternative lifestyles" & it works out great for them. But straight-up cheating or some variation thereof? No, not cool. (Also stupid. As someone who lived in a place with plenty of hourly-rate motels*, I can assure you: if you're stepping out on your wife/husband then no matter how careful you are or think you are, sooner or later you will get caught. You cannot hide it from your partner forever. No one is that slick)
Not sure why I'm thinking about this today...
--
*Las Vegas, a.k.a. America's Gomorrah.
@slowdecline48 your weed story is how they seem to expect us to get drugs in school. Random guy out of nowhere comes and just gives em to ya xD
I wonder what his intentions were though. When you pointed out how close you were to getting caught I thought that was his plan (for some reason). Now i dont know xD
@unassumingEyes No, that wasn't his plan. That's not how busts work, not in the US. When the police set up a sting operation, they try to tempt criminals into working with a UC* so as to catch him in the act. Typically I'd be in the drug business & the cops would send one of their own as a customer, with a recording device hidden somewhere on him. He would try to convince me to sell my product to him. He'd bring money & if I was convinced, I'd sell to him--& get caught in the act.
Just realized I probably should've said "not for children" or something like that in the CW label... 🤦🏼♂️
Okay, you did not read my story or any of that. Right? Uncle Slow doesn't want to corrupt the flower of Pakistan's youth...
*undercover agent--basically a police officer in civilian garb
@slowdecline48 hah. Im not planning on any drugs, dont worry. But sure. I never read a thing 😀
Last night... I don't remember where my dream took place. I do recall that I kept finding oversized quarters, & all of 'em were shiny...a few looked like they were made of silver. Then I woke up with sore neck muscles (trapezius).
Not sure what it means (if anything) but I hope it was a prediction of good fortune. Or at least a good week.
