Course 2: Becoming a 7 Cups Leader - (Discussion #6) How to Accept Feedback

I can't recall the last time I received feedback, it's been too long. I have always felt that people around me tend to be polite and avoid giving feedback. It's understandable but unfortunate at the same time. But if we're talking about the next closest thing, it's receiving advice. Last time I think I reacted defensively. I know their advice was bad, harmful even. This was why I reacted defensively. It feels unfair when someone tried to push such blatantly bad advice on you as if its facts. I have come to realise that sometimes people will be like that and there is no point in making it a conflict if a productive discussion cannot happen. After watching the video, I feel that acknowledging their thoughts would be a good way to go. Not agreeing to it but acknowledging.

@Heather225
Truly, feedbacks are the mirrors of our actions. We should always appreciate it and try to improve us accordingly. Below are my responses against the mentioned question:-

Think about the most recent feedback you received: How did you react? Fortunately my latest feedback was a positive reminder to me that I am doing well. But I obviously not consider that I need no improvement in myself. I always seek forward to reshape myself according to the provided feedback. When I received the feedback I rethought of the whole conversation which I had with the member and I tried to find out for what comforted them the most throughout the conversation as they decided to mention it in the feedback.

How did you feel?
I feel that, we should also analyse the positive feedbacks too so that we know what gestures in us creates the positive impact so that we keep it up throughout and keep including more similar positive actions and gestures in our conversation.

Why do you think you reacted and feel that way?
I guess I wanted to keep a positive approach towards my feedback. On the same time I was also very enthusiast to know how I performed and how much people would appreciate my service so that I keep up my service the in the same pattern.

What would you do differently after having watched the video?
As of now I only focused on the feedback while now I would love to take advises so that I can consider people’s direct views while upgrading my skills in a better way.

@Heather225


I think it is always important to give feedback as long as it is respectful, because there is a fine line between constructive feedback and one that only wants to criticize so that you feel bad.

I believe that there are always ways to address a person and although we have a lot of patience, each one has a limit and we should not listen to those who want to hurt us with their criticism, for example instead of saying your work is badly done, first you have to recognize the work of the other person and say, okay, I liked this part of your work but you could implement this in your work, as I say sometimes I have felt sad because of criticism that is very strong, but if someone says the same thing to me but one kindly I could take it as something constructive.

What I would do is give constructive opinions in a respectful and constructive way

@Heather225

Think about the most recent feedback you received: How did you react? How did you feel? Why do you think you reacted and feel that way? What would you do differently after having watched the video?

I reacted in a neutral way. Listened to everything the person had to share and gave my thoughts when I thought it was needed to explain my perspective.

I felt quite calm and in control. I was confident that I had nothing to be ashamed of and I was convinced that I told what I had to in order for the other person to understand the situation.

I think, from a young age, I was aware of the fact that people have different perceptions and not all can be changed or altered by another person. So I've taught myself to be patient and to be a good listener while giving my input/comments where necessary. This particular scenario I'm thinking of was the same ( but was told in kind of a harsh way ), but I was a bit surprised and proud to see that even when it was harsh I reacted very well.

I don't think I would have changed anything if i had watched this video before it happened. I would have done the same thing. The only difference is that watching the video would have been another proof that I'm on the right path.

@Heather225

Think about the most recent feedback you received: Use of unnecessary words (e.g so, hmm, umm) during formal conversations made me sound casual and not so serious. How did you react?

I was not even aware I used them so often, maybe it was unconscious.

How did you feel?

For a short while, I felt attacked but I looked at it objectively and it later made sense that not using these words will only help me in the long run.

Why do you think you reacted and feel that way?

Because I thought my work and me are not separate ( which I learned after watching the video)

What would you do differently after having watched the video?

I would be more interested to know more feedback and not get disheartened by it and instead have a rational analysis of it.

@Heather225

Think about the most recent feedback you received: How did you react? How did you feel? Why do you think you reacted and feel that way? What would you do differently after having watched the video?

I reacted like a jerk. I found it hard to accept. I felt like I am incapable and that I always fail in the things I do. I reacted and felt that way because it hurt me a lot. I was not ready to hear that. So I found it hard to accept being critiqued. After having watched the video, I would have asked for advice after thanking the person for giving me feedback.

After receiving my most recent feedback, I publicly showed my appreciation for the feedback and appeared to stay calm. However, as the feedback was given, my mind was racing about what I did wrong and if it would ruin my reputation. I most likely reacted this way because I thought I was being criticized for doing something wrong, and I was worried that the other person would look at me in a negative light if I didn't do something correctly. After the video, I realized that I should always take feedback in a positive light, and take my mistakes as learning opportunities and growth. In the future, I will definitely keep an open mind and try to take in the feedback and advice as a map for further personal and professional growth.

@Heather225

Over time, I have gotten used to feedback and can take it in a positive way, regardless of the other person's intentions. Feedback is a way for me to understand what the other person is thinking and therefore, I often appreciate it! Over time, I've learned how valuable feedback is in allowing me to grow. Learning from people's advice allows me to think from multiple perspectives and become an open-minded person. I think, with the information I found in this course, I would definitely continue implementing people's advice. Feedback is important but to put it to use is the key to success in my opinion!

@Heather225

Hello everyone 👋👋👋👋👋

Think about the most recent feedback you received: How did you react?

I received constructive feedback from a listener recently, I was saddened by the misunderstanding between us and how it impacted their wellbeing. I am happy that they reached out to me to express how they felt.

How did you feel?

I felt empathetic and I understood why they were upset and frustrated.

Why do you think you reacted and feel that way?

I only reacted politely as usual. I made them feel at ease so that they can find a way to heal from this misunderstanding.

What would you do differently after having watched the video?

I think I have applied what was suggested in the video, I felt like I was open to feedback, remained calm and understanding. There is always room for improvement.

Think about the most recent feedback you received: I hosted a zoom meeting for a society I run and got some feedback from the attendees afterwards.

How did you react? I was sad at first that not everyone loved the meeting, so I went through all the feedback and sorted it into sections of good feedback and bad feedback and then tried to think about how to improve.

How did you feel? I felt a bit upset and dejected because I had worked really hard to make the best presentation I could, however I was also determined to keep improving and also focus on all the positives that were identified and use that to grow as well.

Why do you think you reacted and feel that way? I was really focused on doing well and so i think I was a bit dejected because I felt like I had put a lot into it, but I think I also felt determined because I knew I now had clear objectives to improve for next time which i was grateful for.

What would you do differently after having watched the video? After watching the video I would definitely take more time out to reflect on my experience and check in with myself and others around me that I am implementing the feedback I am given. Also I think I will take time out to accept and process the feedback so I can be more open to growing and improving constantly moving on.