Course 2: Becoming a 7 Cups Leader - (Discussion #8) When you don't get the role you want
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Hello, students! Let's talk leadership!
Many of you have or will apply for certain roles that interest you! And some times we get it and some times we don't! It can be difficult to find out that we didn't get the role, but we can control how we react to it.
Here are some DOs and DON'Ts:
- DO talk to the leader of the role that you applied for and get some input on what you can/need to do in order to get the role next time! Be aware though most leaders of these roles are busy so give it some time!
- DON'T bring the issue into the support rooms. If you are upset, talking to a peer supporter about how you are feeling is ok!
- DO take some self-care, self-care is good for any occasion but its best to deal with those feelings of failure or disappointment outside of 7 cups, things like going on your member account can be so helpful to overcome some of these feelings
- DON'T think that you are obligated to stay on 7 cups right after finding out bad news, especially if you are in LSR/TL and you see other listeners who have gotten the role that you wanted! It can be hard to deal with and it can cause unneeded jealousy or hurt on your part! Not everyone is like this but if you think that this is a possibility that you can think this way staying away might be a great option!
- DON'T take it personally, everyone is ready at different times. It can be hard for us to realize this but just because someone got the role and they might have been here in less or the same amount of time doesn't mean that you personally are ready! Everyone grows and accomplishes things at different times!
- DO get a mentor, in general its a good idea to get a mentor but for things like your goals on 7 cups mentors can be great and helpful! They can give you feedback, do mock chats with you, and overall help you with your goals as I said before!
- DON'T think you have to apply for every role and every team out there! There is time you don't have to apply for everything! Its super easy to burnout that way, and that can lead to more "rejection" and hurt that none of us want!
*Never let not getting a role the first time discourage you! You will be told when you can apply again and use the feedback that you get to better yourself when you can/decide that you are ready to! practice makes perfect none for us are perfect and no one will ever be! Its a good thing to remember no matter your role as a listener your help is greatly appreciated and you are still helping so many people!*
Question: If you find out you were not given a role, how should you respond? What would you say to the leader who has informed you?
Activity: Please reply to 3 of your peers in this thread with encouraging or supportive words!
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If you find out you were not given a role, how should you respond? What would you say to the leader who has informed you?
For myself, I would take a deep breath, close 7cups website just for now, and write down how I feel at this time. I would probably feel frustrated and disappointed. Then I would take a meditation and log in as a normal listener when I feel like it.
For the leaders, I totally understand that they have their own responsibilities and it’s not personal if I didn’t get the role. I should first thank them for reviewing my application and then ask if there’s anything I could improve to get the role next time.
@Glencia89
Logging out, writing down your feelings and meditating sounds like an amazing strategy! Thank you for sharing it with us.
@Heather225
Ofcourse I'll be sad for sometime but I will never break down . Cause rejection doesn't mean failure . It means to improve success and work . So no worries , I'll try my best to improve on the areas I can , take help rom mentors and other leader and I can settle for any other role or will ty to reapply for the same role again when I am prepared well enough . There's no end to success and improvement. Whats meant eventually finds a way always.
@PhoenixTears5972
I really like your sentence "Whats meant eventually finds a way always.". Of course, not getting an opportunity we wanted, may make us feel sad, but if we'd get it without being ready for it, that's not helpful either. And with the feedback, we can grow, until eventually, we'll find the role that fits us best.
@Heather225
If you find out you were not given a role, how should you respond?
I should stay calm, not take it personally, connect with a mentor and work on my skills so that I have a better chance on getting the role next time.
What would you say to the leader who has informed you?
"Thank you for reaching out to me! Would it be possible for you to tell me what I could work on with my mentor so that I have a better chance on getting a role like this one next time?"
@audienta
everyone is saying connect with a mentor, i really didnt think about that. great job thank you guys!
@Heather225
If you find out you were not given a role, how should you respond? What would you say to the leader who has informed you?
I should accept and respect the decision taken by the team. I would discuss it with my Mentor of the role I have applied for and get some input on what I have done and on what I should be doing in order to get the role next time!
@LoveTracker
i didnt think about discussing it with a mentor of the role, thank you for that tip!
@LoveTracker
It is lovely to hear how accepting you would be! Thank you for sharing your answer Tracker :)
Waves
Great point about a mentor :):)
@Heather225
Question: If you find out you were not given a role, how should you respond? What would you say to the leader who has informed you?
I would respond with kindness and empathy and respect, as i know that there are “limited spots” for certain roles and not everyone makes it, i would ask the leader who informed me what made that decision? And also if i am missing any qualifications or certs and if their is anything i can do to touch up on what i need for the role in the future?
@magicalOcean594
That is a great answer Ocean! I love that you would be kind and respectful even if you did not get the role <3 It is great to see that you would work on touching up your qualifications if needed for the role. Thank you for sharing a positive answer
Waves
@magicalOcean594 That is an awesome approach. That is a positive outlook on things and I appreciate that
@Heather225
If you find out you were not given a role, how should you respond? What would you say to the leader who has informed you?
If I was not given the role, I applied for I would initially be very disappointed and feel a bit let down with myself. However, I would reach back out to the leader to ask them about why I didn't get the role, their opinion and ways I can improve to maybe try and get the role in the future. If the role is no longer an option, I would discuss with the leader other alternatives they feel would be a better fit for me. After I had a discussion with the leader, I would thank them for sharing their thoughts with me and bringing this to my attention. I would also let them know I appreciate them for reaching out and bringing this to my attention and making me aware so I can move forwards and grow. I would use the situation as a learning experience <3 I would also allow this experience to motivate me more :)
Reach back out to the leader is a great response. And it looks like you really want to improve and maybe get the role in the future. What a growth mindset!😀❤️
Discussing with the leader about what other alternatives would fit for you is also a great idea!
It sounds like you want to use failure as a learning experience! That's amazing! I hope you keep growing on your path!❤️
@CalmWaves3939
So great to see you turn what could potentially dishearten you, motivate you!
@CalmWaves3939 beautifully said
If I were not given a role, of course I'm gonna be upset but I will also ask the leader why I didn't get the role and ask what I need to improve. I will also explore what other roles I can be.
@Aileen1114117
And it's okay to be upset about it! Sounds like you'll accept your original response of upset and then move on and want to improve!
@Heather225
I
would show gratitude that I have been considered, and accept that not everyone
is suitable for every role. I would ask for some feedback, as to what my
mistakes were, or what made me not as suitable for the role, so I can improve
where my weaknesses were. I think I’d be interested to know if there was
anything else I could still take on, or with my answers, whether there is a
specific role they’d recommend. Definitely would highlight my gratitude and
focus on what went well and what could go better.
Asking about specific roles, that's fantastic! *steals*
If you find out you were not given a role, how should you respond? However, your reaction is normal and valid however you don't have to be rude about it. You can ask questions. What would you say to the leader who has informed you? Ask questions. Ask them to explain something more. See what you can do differently and if it is something you really want keep trying.
@blissfulTouch29 wonderfully said 👏
@StarrrGirl20 thank you
@blissfulTouch29
That is a very realistic approach. I like what you have shared.
@Helpingheart23. You're welcome
If you find out you were not given a role, how should you respond? With grace, compassion, and trying to understand. Accepting feedback would also be helpful!
What would you say to the leader who has informed you? I would thank them for letting me know and for any feedback, and ask whether the role is still open should I decide to grow and come back to it later <3
@WarmLightXO
Your answer was really mature. Loved it
@WarmLightXO
I like your answer, I think that works too.