Demisexual and Trying to Decipher Feelings

So I’m Panromantic and asexual. If it also adds any depth I’m a trans guy. I’m friends this trans girl whose a year older than me. For sake of this story I’ll call her Ava (not her real name). We have many mutual friends, but I also have a lot of friends who dislike her. This kind of upsets me because she’s not that bad now especially since she just broke up with her ex-partner. Now in December I went through a hard breakup between me and Ava’s mutual friend and still am getting over him. It doesn’t help we still talk and he’s the person helping me with my mental struggles. Me and Ava hung out this Sunday and I realized that I might have feelings for her, or I think. I have no clue, I mean I didn’t even realize she was trans feminine until this weekend. I thought she was just non-binary. Idk, I kind of felt sour when she brought up that she had this they/them from her old school who had feelings or smth, but she did express how she felt that awkward. I don’t know, am I just trying to get over my ex, am I just friends, or am I like using her to better myself because she said she’d care if I died and that made me realize my thought patterns are wrong.

Literally just the fact we’re hanging out tomorrow changed my mood from yesterday in which I cried in every class to now today that I’m happy and smiley and excited. To make matters worse, because I’m unsure, I worry it might cause issues with her ex who happens to be both really close friends with some of my friends and hate some of my other friends. God, she’s really nice and stuff and attractive but idk.