I'm just really not sure
I have had sex and I'm really just not all about it. Maybe its because i've had a seed planted in my mind that sex is supposed to be amazing and its a natural part of life. I really don't know if I would classify myself as asexual or just really not into all of that kind of stuff as much as some other people are. I am highly uneducated in this sort of stuff and i've always been open to learning about it so I can respect others. I'm just really at a loss here for if i possibly could be asexual.
@KiperTheDog03
Hey there!
It's great that you are taking the time to ask yourself some questions, and try to figure out how you really feel in terms of your sexual preferences and possible orientation.
Culture has (in my opinion) kind of made what sex is into what a fantasy of strange requirements and expectations. To me, sex is just like sneezing -- it's something that you need to do to fulfill an urge the body needs to take care of.
This doesn't mean that it can't be a wonderful thing to share with a partner. That's where the emotion within sexual expression comes into play.
If you find that sex isn't all that exciting to you, it's okay. There are a good number of people out there who share the same feeling. For some people, it's because they haven't met the right partner who matches their own sexual vibration, and therefore you haven't experienced sex in a way that you truly would enjoy. For example, some people enjoy it with music on. Some people enjoy it in the early morning, or mid afternoon, instead of at night.
And then there are deeper layers than that. Some people like being tied up, or physicaly "punished" in order to be able to enjoy it. These kind of kinks can be the difference between someone enjoying a sensual encounter, versus just feeling flat-lined and weird because nothing is happening.
With all of that in mind, it could also very well be that it's just not a physically stimulating act for you. Do you ever find yourself feeling sensually aroused when listening or watching something in specific? Or has it always been, "Ehh, this is okay"?
Since asexuality has its own spectrum, it can be a challenge to figure it out. I myself am on the spectrum due to be demisexual, meaning I am unable to be sensually attracted to someone without first having an emotional bond developed between them. This means that not even pictures or videos (or even being in the presence) of people who culture would deem to be physically attractive are enough to conjure up feelings of desire for a person.
Another slice on the spectrum is sapiosexuality. This is when you're not able to feel sensual attraction for someone unless you've deemed them to be a kind of intelligent that you can connect with.
In any case, feel free to take your time with working through your journey into understanding your preferences. When you do, it'll be wonderful :)
Please feel free to pm me if you'd ever like to talk about your thoughts on this subject!
