@funnyOak2320 It can be really confusing and groundbreaking to find out later in life, but you're definitely not the only one! Lots of people have been through the same. It can take a lot of years to discover who you are. It can be due to a number of reasons. We live in a society where heterosexuality is considered the norm, the default, to the point that few people even question their sexuality until something impossible to ignore happens. If society wasn't so heteronormative, if all sexuality were seen as a possible and valid way to be, this would not happen. Everyone would question and explore freely.
However, better late than never! Confusing as it may be, it's great to find out who you truly are! I know it's hard not to focus on what you think is "wasted time", but all your life has led to this. What truly matters is what you do with the time and life you have. You are now free to explore, to experience, to find your place in the LGBT community - and let me tell you, reaching out to the community can be a great way to feel less disoriented and lonely! There are lots of LGBT circles and associations around the world, you can find one next to you: making friends with similar experiences can be as groundbreaking as exploring the sexual side.
It's true, you may have had a different youth, but it doesn't take away the beauty of what you can still have. Welcome to the community!
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Thank you for taking the time to respond. Honestly, I was a bit surprised to have a response because I thought my post had been lost (I'm a bit technologically challenged lol). Luckily, I'm already semi-intigrated into the lgbtq community, as I've always known I'm not straight. I guess my whole view on what it means to be "gay" for me has changed. I was focused purely on sexual attraction. I have always been very much turned on by women, which has been so confusing. I think I've realized now that its more than just what can "turn me on". It's a lifestyle, an expression, etc.
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@funnyOak2320 true, sexuality is much more complex than simple physical attraction, and I also feel like the whole concept of sexual orientation can mean different things for different people. That's why it's so good to explore and never stop questioning every aspect of our identity, it can be confusing but also very enriching!
Also, I'm very glad you're already involved in the community :)
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Yes, thank the heavens I already know many lgbtq people. Many of my old school friends have always known me as straight though. I know they would still support me, but its so awkward. I'm not sure how to exactly start acting like myself in front of everyone. It's very intimidating and feels so weird to even think about
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@funnyOak2320 it's definitely a big jump, but think of it this way: high school friends are people that have changed immensely through the years, everyone in their own way. For social reasons, we tend to think a change (or rather discovery) of sexuality is something bigger than other types of change. But why should it be? Your friends might have become parents, made huge career changes, moved elsewhere, and these are all huge changes in their own ways. So is yours, no more or less than theirs.
Friendship that are so long-lasting feel like comfort, like home. Maybe the discomfort/ awkwardness you expect won't even be that much, since you've been through so much together through the years. Anyway, only one way to find out!
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