I'm struggling
Hello! My name is Jessica, I'm 18, and have recently come to terms with my attraction to girls. For such a long time, I thought I was attracted to guys because that is how I was raised and what I knew was expected of me. In determining whether I wanted to put a label on myself, I don't believe I will ever end up with a male, but I feel guilty not giving guys a shot. I haven't heard of anybody going through this thought process before, so I'm not sure what to do. I want to feel comfortable calling myself a lesbian, but there's still a tinge of doubt in the back of my head.
@Otterball1446 Hey, Jessica. I'm Lily, I've acctualy been through the same thing as you too. There was this one valentines day where I knew a guy liked me so I said I liked him too. He ended up telling the whole 7th grade that I said yes. We never acctualy dated which I'm happy of. 'Cause my now ex-bestfriend didn't approve of us having a relationship. The next year he got a girlfriend and I'm happy for him we don't talk much but we get along well. I'm now completely open to the world except when my family is around. So I just want you to know that it's okay to decline their confession 'cause in the end they will find someone who will actually love/like them. Take care.
First of all, congratulations for successfully going through the questioning phase, which I know can be hard! If you feel like you are attracted to girls and you don't see yourself with guys, that's enough to determine that you are a lesbian, you don't need to experiment to peove it to yourself. After all, if someone isn't appealing to you, why should it change with experience? And why giving a chance to someone you already know you don't like?
This feeling thay you should give guys a chance is the last remnant of the feeling you had before, the feeling that liking guys is what you should/are expected to do. Now it changed form, it became a sense of guilt in not giving them a chance because you're "supposed" to like them. But you don't owe guys anything, you only owe happiness to yourself. And since identifying as a lesbian and liking girls is what feels natural to you, that is also what will make you happy!
