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Longing for lesbian experiences

I’m 24 and have never been in a serious relationship with a woman. I think about it all the time, but I am too nervous to do anything about it. At this point, I feel my lack of experience is a deterrent. I wish there was a more low-key way to meet other lesbians and talk to them without the pressure of experience. I’m so lonely

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@determinedIdea4212 Hi, I hope this finds you well. I understand your longing, truly. I think the best advice would be to try to stay positive, I know how lonely you must be. But you are young there is time for the experience. In my life experience it’s always when we least expect something is when it happens. I hope your lonliness fades it is a pretty terrible feeling. Take good care. 

User Profile: Aayla
Aayla July 18th
@determinedIdea4212 I get it, pressure can be tough, it's not easy to be spontaneous and relate to people with this constant thought in mind. Of course, there are lots of women that wouldn't have an issue with your lack of experience, but not knowing in advance what the other girl would think can make you feel less confident. Although, let me tell you, if someone has a problem with you being inexperienced, it's their loss. Prejudice about people who are not experienced is not a sign of emotional maturity.

I don't know where you usually hang out and meet other women, but maybe it would be helpful to try environments where dating is not necessarily a priority, so that connection between people can build without pressure and only eventually you can consider dating, if you connect well with someone.
For example, volunteering in LGBT associations, or attending LGBT hangout places that aren't necessarily clubs - depending on where you live, queer circles do things like board game nights, book clubs, movie nights, all sorts of things. If you can connect with someone without necessarily having dating or intimacy in mind, you get a chance to explore connections on other levels before gradually getting there.

Am the same , new and trying to discover thing that am so not familiar, am on my 40's but only feeling odd liking a girl intimately not sure what I am really. I think we only need to keep talking about how we feel about it really