Strength Was Never Meant to Hurt This Much
Sometimes trauma is so quiet and so loud at the same time.
I grew up learning that surviving meant staying strong, staying silent, and not giving pain a voice. Hiding it felt safer than opening it. like if I made space for one memory, ten more would rush in. Even now, my nervous system feels more familiar with pain than with peace, and happiness can feel almost suspicious.
As a man, I was taught that feeling this way isn’t allowed. You’re supposed to “man up,” suck it up, keep going for your family, and never show that you’re hurting. Strength meant endurance, not expression. Carry everything. Ask for nothing. That belief stayed with me for years, and it made healing feel like failure instead of courage.
Lately I’m realizing that curiosity might be a small doorway forward asking why a feeling shows up instead of fighting it, writing a few lines even when it feels messy or wrong. Where I come from, giving space to trauma isn’t seen as strength, but I’m starting to question that. I don’t have answers yet. I’m just learning to sit with myself, to listen, and to believe that I deserve a better life than just surviving.
@AbdelAAS
You do deserve to live, and be happy and to find love and give it 💚
It's important to open up, say how you feel and not let anyone define what a man is or isn't.
It's a strength to allow your emotions out.
To ask for help.
And to let people in.
A definition of a man is whatever you think it is, within yourself 💚🤗
@AbdelAAS I'm sorry for the things you went through and all the hurt you hold. I grew up similarly. It's hard trying to unlearn the earlier lessons from childhood. Men grow up hearing man up, suck it up, don't cry. No one teaches men how to heal. So everything is bottled up, hide the fear and smile through the pain. Men are more than providers and protectors. We're human, we have feelings, we have dreams. Some of us were boys who had to grow up too fast. We got hurt, abused, neglected.
@AbdelAAS
Uh... man you have the same problems as me and trust me I m not a man. I grew up in a house where showing any emotion is weakness. And a lot of other stuff I truly dont want to say because I never opened up. I want you to know you can send me a text here and I ll try to help you man. And dont worry. Don't let their "man up" *** get to you.
Sending courage. Be safe and I m here if you need anything.
@AbdelAAS
I had and still have the same things in mind because my household taught me those stuff. And I m not even a man. I m a girl. Please please please send me a text if you need anything