Endless Positivity

@Themaninblackxxx 🤔🤔 I guess you have a point there🤔🤔 are you feeling a bit down right now?? Sometimes all you need is a little pick me up! I'm little yaaaaay! Picks you up ❤ I'm gonna just hug you ❤ because I don't really know what to say sorry ❤❤ squeezes you tightly 

@Themaninblackxxx I agree. Positivity is like the a car lot with a bunch of positivity salesmen bugging you to “take this one out for a spin.” 

@Themaninblackxxx it's cool dont worry I'm a alien 👽, I'll be back to earth in no time😁 yaaay! Gives you a happy smiley huggggg 🤗😃

@Themaninblackxxx yes please use simple  wordies😂😂😂😂 yaaay! We are UK buddies😁 we can organise sleepovers and have pillow fights yaaaay! ❤❤

@Themaninblackxxx You're not the only one by a long shot.

Normally I don't comment in such threads...the only time I do is when I actually feel grateful for something. One reason for the toxic positivity you described is a common assumption that the only way to be grateful is to feel grateful continuously. I consider that notion mistaken, at best. You do not need to constantly feel an emotion in order to remember the reason for such an emotion. I am well aware of the good things I was lucky to get at certain points in my life. That does not mean I feel undying gratitude every day for them. (I might add that what I got didn't come for free; in fact the two main benefits came with high prices...prices I f***ing paid.)

It is unrealistic to imagine, let alone expect or demand, that any human being feel grateful--or joyful/happy/benevolent/etc.--in every waking minute. Life just doesn't work that way, never has & never will. I haven't heard of anyone, past or present, who did not have at least one reason for grief/sorrow, shock, resentment & even fulminating rage at some point in his/her life. To be alive is to suffer. That has been true since life evolved the ability to feel (in other words, when ancient sea animals grew brains & nervous systems) & it will be true for as long as living things exist, breathe, breed--& attack, eat & k1ll each other. Ever since intelligent life evolved, people & other thinking organisms have had to deal with events that cause shock, grief & fury. No one can keep feeling "positive" while going through some kind of chaos caused by Murphy's Law (it's real, man. Murphy's Law is as real as any law of physics or biology. Take my word for it.)

In light of the above information, one can legitimately question whether life is as much a blessing as we are told it is. That question, of course, is one that only you can answer for yourself.

@Themaninblackxxx I will play the devil's advocate here, but let me preface this with this: I think it depends on a prompt and where are you in your current healing journey. If it is framed the way that find something nice in your bad circumstances or trauma, it can be a very triggering experience. If you read the fifth post that day about how to stop and smell the flowers when you feel mentally on the ground under a pile of rocks, you may indeed just wish for it to get out of your sight.

But. I don't think a thread on what are you grateful for is a bad thing. When I started therapy, my therapist explained to me the importance of what you focus on. It's completely ok to have a bad time. It is perfectly valid if there is just nothing great in your day. That's ok. But the thing is. My therapist explained to me that the brain is like a flashlight and will notice more of what we shine the light on. So focusing on positive things and gratitude is a very powerful tool in the recovery as it is easy to get lost in the dark thoughts of the world being a terrible place and life just being the worst. Usually, there is at least one thing even in the bad circumstances we can be grateful for, even if it is difficult. Like maybe you had a horrible day, but you have a warm bed to hide in. Netflix to watch. A hot water to bath in. These things are not granted to so many people. And when you put let's say your bad day into the context of okay I don't have to sleep on the ground on the street. I can watch this show now and forget about all this for the next two hours. There is one more teabag of my favourite tea left and I can have it now, you are programming your brain to break the barrier of negativity that are otherwise very very thick and hard to break, especially if you suffer from depression and without countering the bad thoughts, you are very likely to fall deeper into the pit.

In some way I can relate to you, just not the way you think. I'm replying just as food for thought I guess..

The community here makes me feel supported and helps me stay motivated in my path, so in that sense I can't relate. However.

I've had major back surgery, a fixation of 14 vertebrae because of scoliosis. I look often at a subreddit about these kind of procedures but I had to quit that. My surgery was miserable and still 8 years later I experience chronic pain among other major complications every day. I couldn't look at that subreddit without getting angry because of success stories and feeling bitter about it.

So in a sense I can totally imagine what you experience. I don't have advice though, but I do think you're not crazy for feeling the way you do

@Themaninblackxxx the comment section is 💯 hilarious! 🤣 but I totally get you and I agree. 

Sometimes we’re just so over and done with superficial “good vibes only”, no negativity, no whatever. In reality, all of our emotions and feelings are what we need to navigate life. I admire people who can look any adversity in life and throw in quotes about motivation and whatnot. But just because we don’t think the same way as others do or believe the same principles and stories does not mean one is better than the other.

Hats off to you for bravely speaking up! I see you and hear you and I support the sentiment. ✨

@Themaninblackxxx fr

@Themaninblackxxx

Here's one about Bullying, maybe you will find this to be more up your alley as it were.

https://www.7cups.com/forum/groupmod/SharingCircles_2066/Bullying_322598/

Love, Patience