Count till ten

It's a little story I wrote. I may have infused a little motivation into it. Hope you enjoy. Do tell me what you think.

#Ten

I curled up. There was nothing but the blissful feeling of belongingness. My tired eyes closed, a stasis I couldn't escape from. My legs grasped for the last touch of the wind, my body longed for the soft music of the trees.

But I let my worn out body curl.

I heard cries. But I was unaware, too old and familiar. Too new and unfamiliar.

I felt growth deep inside. The pain of closing, but the pain of a growth spurt. It hurt. But the pain was demanding. It was real.

My body, covered. A spiral of silky warmth, as I said goodbye.

The thin slits closed, choking me. And I lay there, covered in something foreign. In something living. In something dead.

And I was a part of it. A part of a being. A metamorphosis.

#Nine

The silky warmth was unsettling. My body too big for it. It was bound by rules I was yet to learn. And slowly I wanted to break out.

It squeezed me. My claustrophobic body that punched me. I was different. My stasis was yet to end. But I was still growing inside.

I heard cries, words being whispered, condolences being spoken, comforts being screamed, encouragements being orated.

And then I was pushed out. And then I was pulled.

The silky warmth that surrounded me broke. I was left with nothing but cold air, the darkness of the skies. Then I was alone.

I heard more cries. Not of joy, or of salvation. But of curses. Of voices speaking to me. And voices moving away from me.

And then I hand picked me up, kissed my forehead, and I was passed on.

It wouldn't open. I was struck. I was forsaken and given up to nature to nurture.

#Eight

I felt invisible. My legs attached to a mass, I felt weak. And then came the foreboding woe of the night. As the darkness impeded its gloom over me, I felt myself break free.

The discomfort of the first step as something flew through my body. I felt it, the electric spark of life within me. It ached. But I ached to explore.

My hands held the edge of the table. Tiny and Invisible among the mass of others. Between their feet, I crawled. The chopped bits of the table sprinkled on the floor. I was seeing them. Unlike the red, I saw everything I couldn't comprehend.

I felt myself in air, and then my legs gave away. Unsupported, unbound, I hit the rock bottom.

My body was ready. I was ready. I flapped them. Yet again, I felt the familiar complement of the every brightening skies, as the morning dew drops hit me. My humble abode, my leaf, bid me a goodbye. It curled around me, whispering its words to me.

And then was soaring through the skies.

Failures after failure, without help, I learnt. Without appreciation, I persevered. And I was up in the air again.

#Seven

It was liberating. The cool breeze against me. The span of my wings in air. I was free. And alone.

When the darkness strikes again, the tears would fall. And I would quietly whisper the words on my unknown parentage.

I had walked and ran. But I had no one. I was alone in the fight for survival. They weren't like me. Nobody was.

I learnt. They were taught. I was born and sent away. Then were born and welcomed. They said a word I didn't know, they spoke of a 'mom'.

The word was meaningless to me. A woman. Somebody. I had heard her voice. For a split second, I had heard her speak. I remember the feathery kiss on my forehead. I yearned for that touch, that breath against my cheeks.

And they were all exploring. Many like me, surrounded the field. And I was a newcomer. Unwelcome. They stared at me with scorn.

They were no different. But I was larger. They were all bright and beautiful. I was a pall of gloom to their brilliant dazzle.

#Six

The stark beauty of a landscape flitted past my eyes. The grainy landscape of colours cocooned me. I felt the thrill of learning again.

My wings spread out and I was soaring. The little flower welcomed me. As I lay on it, my head rested against its soft petals, it whispered to me the tales of legends. The pellucid stories of success. And I listened.

The gates held. The doors failed to remain closed. I held my hands out. They passed me cheap spirits. And I was drinking them.

My unscathed, untouched mind explored the vividness of opportunities. I felt the need to belong. I held hands with what could have been a childish pleasure of unrequited joy. And I ran. Unobstructed by standards and lies.

The little petals cocooned me in the night, wrapped me in its glory and held me through my fears. It offered me it's sweetness. I offered it my uniqueness and I grew.

In the wilderness, I learnt. I walked. I fell. I stood up and ran.

#Five

Goodbyes were meaningful. My heart felt a spark of emotion as my dear friend departed. Its petals began to wilt. Unable to hold me anymore. My weight and comfort became its burden. I held my wings in air, held it tender petals in my soft touch. It's broke off, it's petals fell off. And the cry of pain sounded in my ears.

The hands that held me left me. Yet again I was alone. Held by calloused hands I was taught to labour. I hid my face in a cascade of others. Unfamiliarity resounded around me. And I fell into a rhythm. Unaware of my legacy I learned to struggle.

We parted as companions. And with its weakest smile, I felt the last of its days. With a gentle touch of its petals, it fell. Noble and mighty.

I drew away from my home. Taken into another. Dark and dingy, my eyes so nothing but pain. And here I belonged. Among others who were learnt. Not taught. Fear scented the air. And I breathed it in. I allowed my myself to feel it. And it, coursed through me.

#Four

I felt fear. My wings refused to move. It struggled. I struggled. Rootless and helpless, I cried for another. I was numb, my wings held in a tangle of mess. A patchwork of beauty that held deadly charms. And I was tempted.

Into the unknown, I walked. I let it hold me. The dark hallways, my curiosity led me haywire. And I let myself go. A den of danger and deceit and I was a humble worker.

I counted my last. Waited for miracles. Recoveries.

The physical pain was endurance. And each hit held me grounded. I felt it in my bones, my broken body hurt, but I smiled through it.

I lived in a world without miracles. Where friendships were simply to be lost. And carriers were left. I was lived in a world where nothing mattered.

I walked myself to the shack I build for myself. The footpath that complimented my weak body. Starving and hungry, I slept. The soreness comforted me. The pain demanded heat, and the cool winds stung me and then I fell in love with the discomfort. It became me.

And then I was free. The last attempt at the struggle, a strategic decision and I was free. Alone I was free.

#Three

I held my head high as I walked into a den of others like me. But here, there was nothing. And there was everything.

I begged and cried for food. My work held me back. Routine tasks of striking and pulling and then dropping. The stench of an uneven breath. And the sorrowful goodbyes whispered behind my back.

I saw vibrance in nothingness. Millions of others like me. And there was beauty in unfamiliarity. Wings fluttered around me. Prompting me to move. I was pushed and pulled. And then I joined them. Small and big. Bright and dark. They assembled around me. And then we were flying. One and whole. The skies, ours to conquer. And like my fallen friend, there were others here. And there were others growing and learning like me.

I felt my stomach hurl. But there was nothing to come. My eyes searched hungry and violent.

My hands refused to reach. My clothes hung loosely along my ankles. My bones ground together as I walked.

#Two

I saw them. On trees. Wrapped in cocoons. The reminiscent memory of my life flashed past me. A few seconds before it all ends, you experience your life yet again. I felt it flutter within my fingers and then I hit it. The glass jar that held me. The lid slammed shut. My wings struck against each other.

I lay down. Nothing more to look forward to. And I lay there. Unable to move. Born into the world as insignificant. Lived in the world as invisible and died unnoticed and unmissed.

#One

My wings strangled me. I choked. My stomach growled. Thirsty and malnourished. Sick and weak, my heart bet. And with the last flutter, everything stilled.