Reconnecting
Hi @helgyafy @tinywhisper11 @mytwistedsoul
I hope you don’t mind me creating this thread. I’m sorry, I haven’t been online lately and I couldn’t find where we’ve chatted before. I think of you all often and the kindness you’ve shown me, and I wonder how you’re doing. I really hope you’ve been well. I’m sending you prayers. Please pray for or think of me too when you have a moment. Please let me know how you’ve been.
❤️
@TinyWhisper11 How are things going with you sweetest? Here’s some pie for you. 😊
@PiecesOfWhoeverIWas nom nom nom 😋😋thankyou😋 I'm doing ok😁 keeping busy ❤ one of the older folks here have me a Indiana Jones action figure doll thingy yesterday😁😁😁 he's reallyy cool😁❤
@Tinywhisper11 Aw that’s really nice!
@TinyWhisper11 How are you? How are you feeling? How’s the weather? Are you enjoying your Indiana Jones? 😊
@PiecesOfWhoeverIWas I'm doing good😁😁 just been thinking a lot about my ex would look like now, will be be all fat and bloated, or disgustingly skinny, or perhaps someone's already found the body🤔🤔🤔🤔
😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂 I love my Indiana Jones doll 😁 I carry him with me everywhere😁😁❤ hope your doing ok to?
@Tinywhisper11 You’re so funny. 😂 I’m doing alright, thank you for asking. ❤️
@PiecesOfWhoeverIWas That's nice<3
@BlueDarkAurora How have you been?
@PiecesOfWhoeverIWas ooo! A tasty squirrel😋
@Tinywhisper11
@BlueDarkAurora 😂😂😂😂😂😂 sorry I should of asked you if you wanted some squirrel😂😂😂😂
@Tinywhisper11 xD
@BlueDarkAurora 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂
@PiecesOfWhoeverIWas I'll come back to this with a wall xD Thank you so much for allowing me to be a thought that you remember from time to time, it's nice to be stored somewhere safe sometimes ~_~ *me being poetic*
@PiecesOfWhoeverIWas We are all bugs xD so bugging is kinda like virtual hugging ha ha ha...ha
And it's the opposite for me when you ask I think it must be annoying that I always say I'm okay.. like ugh "can't she just say something else for once!!??"
It's honestly nice to see you around (I'm sure this is totally the first time I'm telling you this :3), a friendly face that I know I can just go up to and be like heyyyyyyyyy :D And I like this space that you've made as well, this is my first penpal so I'm always happy about visiting here.
In our inner world walls are supposed to be taken down gently so first we do need to see how long and strong they are so that we can start working on helping each other throw away one brick at a time.
I so adore you for wishing that for me!! You hold that hope strong for me and I'll be doing the same for you<3
@WorkingItThrough2 I thought I replied to you a couple days ago, but when I went through to check things just now I don’t see it there. I’m sorry for leaving you hanging. I’m going to make a new post down here instead of replying there if that’s ok.
The feelings you describe are similar to how I felt in my marriage. I wish I knew the answer. I think the idea is still permeated so deeply that a woman has these specific roles. Even amongst ourselves, I think sometimes we place part of our value on being “a good woman” or “a good mom”, which includes these traditional checkboxes. There’s an epidemic of women comparing themselves to other moms on things like creating the perfect birthday for their children. I even enjoy cooking and cleaning, but I can get resentful if it’s seen as only my responsibility. I work and do other things too. It’s harder when the other person either isn’t helping with those things or doing something, but still expecting to be taken care of. I can get resentful if there are double standards, like the partner can relax and do hobbies, but I’m so busy taking care of them and things that I never get to do mine. Or if I actually do something for myself and am in the middle of something, they’ll interrupt me to ask what’s for dinner.
This makes me feel bad to say, but sometimes I’m resentful that the Bible contains certain rules about women. There are people who believe it’s a reflection of the time period, and there are others who think these rules transcend time. I don’t mean to make a debate. It confuses me really, I think maybe the reality is somewhere in the middle. There are differences in men and women, and they’re ok and to be celebrated, but I think shouldn’t ever be used to hold either down. The Bible also talks about mutual love and care for one another.
Do you think you feel taken for granted in general or sometimes? If you are being taken for granted, no matter who it is, it doesn’t mean that’s all you are. There is so much depth to you, and it’s their loss to take all you do (and are) for granted. They don’t get to decide who you are. In saying that though, believe me I do understand it doesn’t make the situation easier. We still have a need to be seen and appreciated. We don’t want to feel alone in our daily lives or around people we love.
I’m sorry you’re going through this. I hope you’ll continue to build yourself up and do things that make you happy. I pray that you might make a friend who can help give you some of the care you deserve, if others around you are shortsighted. I am hoping for the same thing. But I fight against myself not really wanting to keep putting forth the effort to meet new people and keep being vulnerable. Thank you for being here and being you. What you share helps me too, so much.
@PiecesOfWhoeverIWas
Thank you so much for your insight❤️. I think my family thinks I am the maid service, the cook and the cleaning woman. Oh and do not forget the nurse😒.
I am none of them, I am a wife and mother. I do what I do out of love and concern for them. I wish they understood that Because this old girl can and will Nut up and them all🤣
@WorkingitThrough2 Appreciation is like the fuel that fires the love that helps us be strong for our family. Running empty is exhausting<3 I'm sorry that all your efforts are going unnoticed like that and it's totally understandable if you would want to remind them that love taken for granted can also be taken away.
You're an awesome artist and an amazing person<3 and I hope your family also remembers that and feel grateful to have you with them.
@BlueDarkAurora I second this. You said it so beautifully. ❤️
@PiecesOfWhoeverIWas @mytwistedsoul @BlueDarkAurora hi everyone ❤ something has happened, I can't explain right now 🙁 but I'm very scared, and I probably won't be here for a while. Until everything is ok and I'm safe again ❤ I love you all ❤
@Tinywhisper11 Something here? You're safe where you are now yes? If it's here can you report the problem? I hate to think you won't be here for a while. I'm so sorry you're scared, if there's anything we can do, you know we always have your back. Be safe. Much love to you (tight hugs) ❤️❤️
@Tinywhisper11
OMG, Praying for you, right now sis🙏
@Tinywhisper11 Oh 😔 Lola I’m so sorry you’re going through this. Please do whatever you need to be and feel safe. We will be thinking about you and praying for you. ❤️ We love you.
@Tinywhisper11 that is super concerning<3 Safe again? I hope you are safe now and will always be safe and happy. I hope you feel the warmth of all our love for you wherever you are<3 Come back to us soon<3
@Tinywhisper11 Thinking of you<3
@BlueDarkAurora @mytwistedsoul @PiecesOfWhoeverIWas @WorkingitThrough2
hi everyone thanks for your caring messages🙂 I'm ok just some butt jokes starting things, and a security breach🙁 but I think I'm safe now ❤
@Tinywhisper11 butt holes*
@Tinywhisper11
I am glad you are ok❤️. Sorry, you had to go through that ordeal. I have been working on a special project just for you. I will post it when I get finished and I hope you like it😊
@WorkingitThrough2 your making some thing for me?!? Yaaaaaaay I love you soooo much ❤❤ your so sweet and kind to me ❤ has your husband having his operation this month?
@Tinywhisper11
Hey sis, My husband had his surgery on Thursday He is doing well. Thanks for asking.
Yes I am working on a special project just for you❤️❤️❤️😊
@WorkingitThrough2 oh thank God he's finally had it ❤ hopefully this year will bring you only good things ❤❤ I love you sis ❤ and yaaay! Can't wait to see what your making me😁 I feel so special, thankyou ❤❤
@Tinywhisper11 you're back!! :D and it's okay, as long as you're safe and with us<3 everything is fine :)) <3
@BlueDarkAurora thankyou ❤❤ it's been a rough couple of days🙁 all security was checked, lots of questions. The security breach was in London, where another survivor went, and before taking her own life, she wanted to get back at the bad people, but it went wrong🙁 I'm still a bit scared while they are trying to sort everything out😥 but when I logged in here just now, I actually smiled ❤❤ I'm happy here, safe with you all ❤
@Tinywhisper11 I'm so sorry Tiny<3 That is very terrifying<3 of course you were scared and understandable that you still are. This all must have been tiring too, I hope you are resting well and I'm so so glad to hear that you smiled, I'd bring you a bunch of balloons and flowers if I could<3 I'll just be holding your hand in my thoughts<3
@BlueDarkAurora thanks sweetie 💗💗💗💗
@Tinywhisper11 Tiny! ❤️ It's really good to see you back and wonderful to hear that you're safe! We were really worried about you! (big hugs!) ❤️
@mytwistedsoul hugggggggs ❤❤ I love you soul ❤
@Tinywhisper11 ❤️ Love you too! ❤️
@Tinywhisper11 Hey girl! ❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️
I’m so relieved to hear from you. This whole situation sounds absolutely awful. I can see why you’d still have some fear. I’m really happy you’re safe, and especially that coming here is a safety net for you. You have a good support system around you, there and here. You are taking good care to stay safe. I hope one day soon you won’t have to worry about these people anymore.
@PiecesOfWhoeverIWas thankyou ❤❤
"You are the sky, everything else is just the weather." :)
@BlueDarkAurora awwww 💗💗💗💗 you are the best
@Tinywhisper11 How have you been doing the last few days Lola? Are things calming down a little?
@PiecesOfWhoeverIWas some people are coming to talk to me on Monday about the stuff that happened last weekend. My carers think they are just gonna go through basic safety recaps, and reassure me that everything's gonna be ok
@Tinywhisper11 I’m glad there’s some ongoing support there for you. I hope you’re feeling ok.
@Tinywhisper11 :)
@BlueDarkAurora I love this quote! Thank you for sharing it. I hope things are going ok for you.
@PiecesOfWhoeverIWas yep thank you<3 I hope the same for you :D
@WorkingItThrough2 How are you? How has your husband’s recovery been?
@PiecesOfWhoeverIWas
His recovery is going well. My recovery is another thing? I did not go with him for his follow-up visit.
I was tired and just burned out. Words between us have been very few, maybe because I am in my feelings—feeling physically and emotionally drained. I am really tired of putting my needs at the back end to meet him and my daughter's needs. It is like it always has been for me, I am not important nor are my needs even worth being considered. I am a human being and I really try hard to be the best person I can. That has not worked, so I am flipping the script.
I Don't Care, what I say oiron wheres out.r how I act. Even
@WorkingitThrough2 Oh my friend, my heart is hurting for you. It feels so wrong that you are putting so much love out there for your family and it is going unappreciated. Maybe there is some appreciation on some level, but it sounds like a lot taken for granted and they aren’t giving back much to you to help support you in return. I’ve learned some relationships can have one person giving a little more depending on the personalities, but it shouldn’t be completely lopsided. You don’t deserve that. I’m glad your husband is doing well. I don’t know what all you do for your daughter, but I hope she has a revelation soon to try to give a little back to you. I wish I could visit you and make you a nice cup of tea, and we could just sit and you could talk about whatever’s on your mind, and you could take a nap while I clean the kitchen. Do you get many chances to rest?
I hope everyone had a tolerable week and has an enjoyable weekend!
@mytwistedsoul yep! This weekend should be good, I joined a autopsy club😁😁 tomorrow is open mic night😂😂😂😂
@Tinywhisper11 Are you taking volunteers from the audience?
@mytwistedsoul 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂 I really hope not😂😂😂😂
@mytwistedsoul I think we were posting at the same time! How cool! 😊 I hope you have a good weekend too Twist.
@PiecesOfWhoeverIWas I think you're right! I wanted to visit here earlier in the week to see how you were but it completely slipped my mind!
Thank you!
@mytwistedsoul You have been quiet lately Twist (at least that I have seen in the areas I visit here). How are you doing? Is the weather warming up in your part of the world?
@PiecesOfWhoeverIWas Hello :) It was a few degrees warmer today than it was earlier in the week. Next week we may get into the 40's.
I guess I have been fairly quiet. Just keeping to myself. I'm not sure why.
How are things with you?
@mytwistedsoul Oh it’s quite cold where you are. It’s been similar here. I wouldn’t mind so much if it wasn’t so windy all the time. I don’t know how the chickens stand it.
I am feeling ok, thank you. Do you think it’s the type of quiet that you need right now, or that you think you have to be? Have the legal things calmed down for you? How are your animals? I don’t mean to break any needed quiet though Twist. So no need to answer unless you’d like to.
@PiecesOfWhoeverIWas I'm not a fan of the cold lol. The wind has been persistent this winter. It just makes it horrible to be outside. I've come to the conclusion that chickens are just nuts! It's good to "hear" that you've been feeling okay. I hope good things come to you. ❤️
@mytwistedsoul I’m so glad the financial part of things is settled. It’s one less layer adding to your stress or weighing down your healing.
Things really do build up to a point where words just aren’t enough, and trying to put them together is exhausting. There have been times I’ve gone through my day thinking that at some point I’m going to come here and write. But by the time I sit down I’ve already been thinking about it too much, or something else has happened on top of it, and I just feel so drained that I lose the desire to try. It’s frustrating though too, isn’t it? There’s a backlog that wants to be shared, but the words get all jumbled up where we can’t make sense of them. Then add to that these thoughts of why we shouldn’t share, what we fear people think, or what we think about ourselves.
Those headaches don’t sound good. That definitely makes reading, writing, thinking, and anything else that much harder. I hope you get some relief from them soon. Is there anything that helps?
@PiecesOfWhoeverIWas but I do really appreciate you coming here and checking up on us all and letting us take a step into your world as well<3 It's like we've all been in the thought palace of each other for a cup of tea and you're the one who always brings all the sweetest cookies.
@BlueDarkAurora That last sentence was so cute. I’m going to save it. ☺️
@BlueDarkAurora
Hello, hope these few lines find you doing well. How are things going for you?
@WorkingitThrough2 oh that's so sweet<3 You've made my day :D Thank you!! I'm okay ^-^ Hope things are going well for you too.
@PiecesOfWhoeverIWas Thank you. I'm glad that the estate is settled too, that it's no longer hanging over my head and yet... it's complicated, the feelings.
@mytwistedsoul Headaches are real headaches lol Whenever I have one it becomes my personality xD I find that orange juice helps me, also maybe ginger mint tea.
Hope your headache goes for a long vacation and decides to get settled there :)
@BlueDarkAurora Thank you! I'll have to give those a try. I must admit though, I've never heard of ginger mint tea. I'll have to see if I can find some :)
@mytwistedsoul I agree with Aurora, when headaches persist like that they really do take over our personality. Sometimes I’ll be cranky and not realize until several days later that it’s because of headaches like that or some other chronic pain. Maybe it is weather changes, I hope they give you some relief soon.
It makes sense that it’s complicated feelings with the legal part being over. That was a type of connection to him still. I would be the same about holding onto the paperwork. There are things I’ve kept sentimentally with mixed feelings. You have such a big heart. I hope for good things to come into your world.
@PiecesOfWhoeverIWas Thank you ❤️
