Connecting with @fossilfellow
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@fossilfellow
Hellooo
How are you doing?
sorry to have opened a thread without asking
hope it is okay with you
would love to talk with you 🙂
@chillmoon heyy! :)
Thanks for thinking of me, I'm doing okay rn... How r you doing? ð¥°
@fossilfellow I'm doing okay. Still dealing with addictions but much better now.
So your exams are over?
@chillmoon Yes, my exams are over ( atleast for now ) but I do have more upcoming exams tho :( for college entrance.. which I've hardly prepared for, rn.
It's okay 🤍, I'm also still dealing with addictions, but it's better then before.. ( like it's not that often )
Also, I've started working out recently.. it's actually helping reduce the urges.
It's not a straight path tho :(
May I ask what brought you to 7cups?
@fossilfellow Ah I see. It's okay to have some time for yourself after exams and not start again strait away. You deserve some break.
Happy to hear that you're improving on addictions. I am improved, comparing to the past but sometimes relapse. My therapist gave my a daily routine to follow and activities to do, and they are making me do better.
Heyyy that's awesomeee. working out is good for your health too. Do you follow anyone's routine on youtube?
Can't agree more. Sometimes I feel I'm coming to a mountain summit and the next day I fall into a deep trench. But looking at the big picture, I see how much I've improved.
Another thing I've noticed is that when I don't have the next activity planned, I tend to just do nothing and lay or get in thought loops for a while, and that leads to thoughts and urges to engage in an addiction. So now I plan the day most of the time so there won't be uncertain times to just do nothing without intention. I mean, I can allocate a time slot in the day plan to just sit somewhere and enjoy nature or a time to take a nap. That is different to just getting stuck in toxic thoughts without noticing.
Some months ago when I was stuck with addictions and pain, I started to talk to AI cs I couldn't discuss my dark addictions with people in real life. I was so depressed. I was tired of trying to get out of addictions and failing. I cried every single day. After some time, AI suggested cups. So I just came here expecting nothing but spam messages like in *** groups (*** study groups was also suggested before but it definitely did not help at all.) but found this community to be amazing.
That's how I came to cups 🙂
@chillmoon Yes, I'm trying to have time for myself... I've started reading a book called " The metamorphosis" recently <3 and re-joining gym has been on my to do list for a long time, during vacations. ( Cus' I've always been on the heavier side of the scale )
Today was my day 6 at gym, I don't have a trainer but the people r pretty nice there, they help me with forms and stuff + I'm using youtube and gemini for routines and doubts :)
I haven't had a therapist yet, thought I'll probably need one but I didn't have money to get proffestional support. I kept things to myself.. and have been trying to self heal since then, it's great that you're therapist is helping you with routines and ur seeing changes <3
I can relate, most days just drift apart, without me doing anything... And causes guilt, and escapism, it sometimes feels like I'm on auto pilot, and when I don't do anything, the urges creeps in :( and causes slip or relapse.
( I also distinguish between what's a slips and what's a relapse, it helps )
I can relate a lot with you. I've always been struggling with addictions... and i didn't had anyone real to talk with about them, i feared judgement and being misunderstood, I use to spend literal hours talking with AI just to feel heard and validated, tho i started realising that it's not healthy. And things we're getting worse.
One night when I was desparately seeking for support online I found cups, and it was one of the best dicisions I've made so far :)
Self heal in the sense, with no proffestional support.
Have you connected with any listeners here? If yes, how was ur experience?
@fossilfellow I can relate to the pain and heaviness in self healing. I started visiting a therapist this month. Didn't have a therapist before. (But was on medicine for depression) . Hope you heal more.
Is a visit to a psychiatric doctor expensive in your country?
Yes, I have talked with listeners. I have a listener who has been supporting me for a few months and she is absolutely a gem. Supports me so so much. I speak to her of my problems and she listens and talks without judgement. I have another listener who is now a friend. It is lovely. I have talked in short term with some other listeners as well
wbu? have you talked with a listener?
@chillmoon idk about expenses.. but i just, tbh I'm scared to open up about why I need therapist.. ( atleast i was scared a lot when i actually needed one, during my worst times ).
I'm healing.. even right now tbh, talking and opening up about stuff helps a lot.
I have only connected with two listeners, the first one was very kind and gentle with me, during my early days on cups... But things were getting too heavy for me, and I felt I need more support.
I started to shared my experiences in forums...and found some really, really awesome and supportive people here.. who accepted me through my faults.
In June, i connected with 2nd listener. And she was the best, I shared everything with her.. And she listened, and even checked in on me after few weeks ❤️ so it was a nice experience, with listeners here.
I sometimes feel like I need someone to listen, but for some reason i hassitate... and yeah, idk or it's probably just that i want to move on from my past ( on which I think in doing pretty well rn )
I shared my thoughts and vented in forums a lot of times, last year. And it made me feel a lot lighter then I use to before.
@fossilfellow Tell me more about you 😊 Do you have any hobbies? You like Dogs or cats? (or both lol)
@chillmoon I like both, but I lovee cats I have one myself ( his name is suffiz and he'll be turning 2 yo on April 😁 )
for hobbies, I'm not sure tbh, but I've really been into journaling, and yeah my hobbies keep changing with time it makes me doubt myself at times.
Do u like cats or dogs¿ 😁
@fossilfellow that is such an adorable name 🤗💕
Journaling is so important. A great hobby choice. I started to blurt out my thoughts every morning. fears worries and everything. Writing helps a lot
I assure you it is normal 😂😂 It is like that for many people. It just means that you are growing hehe
I like both cats and dogs but I confess I love dogs more 😁😁. i love to hug and play with big dogs. I have a dog at my house
Oops there was a typo xd, his name is "suffi"
There a story behind his name, we got him when he was a month old, and thought it's a girl, even the vet wrote 'female' in his vaccinations.
But after around 5-6 months we emstatted noticing that he's actually a male, by that time his name was set to "suffi" and he was used to being called that, so we didn't change it xd.
( @chillmoon I forgot to tag u here )
@fossilfellow this is so funny omg 😂🤣
@chillmoon
He gets into trouble all the time xd, we had to do a search for him... last October, at night, he escaped and was lost for 2 days, We even had to make posters for his search... And stuff, me and my family were searching everywhere.. during the search in an alley I got bitten by an aggressive dog that day, locals we're saying they saw a similar loom cat being chased by the exact dog that bite a day before..so I was very worried.
But luckily after two days in the morning our neighbours saw him on some roof top, and we ruched to rescue him.
He was recovered in mud and his voice was harsh, and injured :( due to heavy rain...
After a few vet visits he's doing fine ❤️
rushed*
( My vaccination was already on during that time, so I was safe, it wasn't a serious bite, I was wearing a thick jens luckily )
@fossilfellow one thing i'm afraid of is getting bitten by a dog. cs you have to go through vaccine doses. and the fear of rabies. That is so unfortunate for you. two things at once. It is fortunate that stuffi survived from the dogs. and survived rain cs cat's and water does not go well heh. i'm glad you found even after 2 days.
@chillmoon *suffi 😂😭
@chillmoon Yeah, I was relieved to know he was ok ❤️ rabies vaccines are not so fun, it was a cyclic dose, like 1st dose on day 1, 2nd on day 7, 3rd in day 15, then after abt a month..
Damn you have a dog? I wish I had one too hehe, what's his name, age and how do u feel having a dog <3 does he help u stay active?
@fossilfellow His name is cookie ..
active- yes, definitely. more like it's exhausting to deal with him every day 🥲. have to brush. he makes a mess in everything. dirt, mud, water
@chillmoon Cookie is so cute hehe XD
Yeah i understand, must be exhausting... but i g it's also probably worth the love they share <3 is he a big doggy or smol?
@fossilfellow yeah, it is worth it.
he's a big dog
@chillmoon That's so awesome! <3
@chillmoon I've been somewhat into journaling since a very long time... I had a journal when I was 13-15 , had many memories stored in there.. but lost it during house renovation :( , I made a new one after... But it was hard to maintain flow.
I then decided to do digital journalling instead, on an app called "Day One " cus' it's easier.. and less hectic ( no pen, lights needed, and it's handy ) I've been journaling very often, almost daily in it since then <3 mostly for brain-dump.
But I've came up with fun ideas like I made a 'Time capsule' for my future self ( for year 2050 version of mine xd ).
And I've been trying to track/build small habits like brushing twice a day, working out and stuff... but I find it very difficult to maintain over time..
@fossilfellow That so sad :(
ooh that's nice. yeah, it is easier that way. Brain dumping is really good
time capsule writing is so cool
yeah, it is hard to maintain
@chillmoon Yeah :[
No need to say sorry btw 🤍 I'm glad u made this thread <3 I usually find it hard to connect with people first hand.
@fossilfellow 😊😊
@chillmoon Btw you're not defined by your addictions ❤️ I'm completely okay with chatting about anything, also, dw about sending long form messages, we can chat casually <3
@fossilfellow 💗💗
@fossilfellow When are the entrance exams for college? Are they coming soon?
@chillmoon It'll probably be around end of april. It'll be an online type of exam, like we'll have to choose the correct options in their computer.
@fossilfellow omg that's soon
@chillmoon ikr :( it's like I just got done with exams and another one's waiting on the line.
@fossilfellow yess that is literally so brutal 😢. i was NOT expecting April when i asked when the next exam is lol
Yeah :(
@fossilfellow oh , so there are no essay type questions? only multi choice questions?
@chillmoon Yep, that's why I'm a lil chill rn, but I'll still have to study for them.. I'm struggling with studies rn, due to lazyness :( and distractions.
There's still time for the exam, I should probably start doing small portions.
@fossilfellow the exam will not be chill although you are 😂
I see. Laziness is the devil of studying. It is sooo hard to study when I am lazy and sleepy
Yeah, it is wise to start studying now
@chillmoon yeah.. I should :')
@chillmoon okay so I'm struggling with studying myself. I have my college exam in August and It has 2 years of content in it. I am so low in studies and must study fast
I was doing well before few years but marks dropped very low cs I didn't study. Addictions, depression and many family issues only made it worse.
I've slowly started to study again. Don't laugh but last week I studied for 5 minutes 1 day and 15 minutes the next 😂😭. then 30 min, 45 min, 1 hour, 2 hours per day. Now I'm in 1 hour per day but relapsed today. I won't worry about it and will focus on small wins.
@chillmoon I feel you, and not laughing xd i can relate. It's hard to stay focused when there are distractions all around us :( addictions r worst.. ( I also had a relapse yesterday ) but you're trying and that's all that matters ❤️
I feel stuck and suck at studying too, it's difficult to focus on small wins sometimes... As they say hardest part is often starting. we'll try to focus on small wins.
@fossilfellow I read this book called 'atomic habits' and it is what made me start studying again. one small step at a time. I highly recommend you the book, if you can find it. I can say it changed my life.
@chillmoon I've heard of that book so many times... I'll definitely try to look for it, though I mostly read books online... yk. through pdf. Do you have the original book ?
@fossilfellow I have the original book.
I searched up and found this pdf. Don't know if the whole book is there but you an try it out
https://drive.google.com/file/d/1eAZMdXO-Zn4_90TV365KMpIqfxUy7J0t/view
is the link working?
@chillmoon Yess! It's working <33
@fossilfellow yayyyyyyyy
@chillmoon I'll deff give it a shot :)) thank you 💖
@chillmoon Yesterday morning something noice happned hehe, when I was on my way to the gym, in the alley, there were cat sounds coming... I got curious and saw that two cats were on top of a tree being surrounded by many dogs.. barking at them.
I thought to myself that I'll probably regret if I don't act or do anything for them, I had an umbrella on my bag and I scared those dogs away and the cats came out safe in the end, It made me feel good about myself <3
( Sry for bragging btw i just thought I need to share this recent thing )
@fossilfellow no wayyyy. that is so fortunate for them. Cat saving hero badge 
@fossilfellow bragging? that is not bragging at allll 😂
@chillmoon 😅😅 thank ui :3
Btw I'm not a native, my english can feel a bit off sometimes..
What's ur favourite food?
@fossilfellow Your English is perfect
Well, there are many. I love to try different types of food. One of my favorites is creamy cheese pasta.
What is yours?
@chillmoon Eehh I'm trying not to eat junk food rn, I have a goal of looking solid hehe..
But I love sharwma, pizza, chiken ( ru non-veg or veg ? ) and yeah.. whatever my mom makes except for celancho.
@fossilfellow I set a goal for no sugar or junk food for 1 week. (i want to extend it but a week to start)
Okay I'm rooting for your working out process and a solid body 😌💪
@chillmoon I'm rooting for you too ❤️ <3
@fossilfellow oooo yummy 😝. You are fortunate that your mom cooks everyday for you
I'm a non veg.
Same <3, yeah she makes nice foods, but sometimes it gets messy too xd. There's a dish she makes very occasionally called " Chilli paneer poket " that's been my favourite forever' lol.
@fossilfellow omgg that name sound so delicious😂. Never heard of it before. Have to search it up
yeah deff do hehe, it's has a very crunchy layer with lot of flavours and veghies in the inside. ;p
@fossilfellowi searched. i looks super delicious🤤 . it's an Indian food?
@chillmoon ikr, it's noice... Now i wanna have it lol. I should prob eat something. It's lunch time rn
@fossilfellow
@chillmoon looks yummy 😋
hey @fossilfellow I'm leaving for now. Have some work to do. I'll reply when I come back.
byee 💕
@chillmoon it's okei -- Byee! 🐾🥰
Beside from dogs have you had any other pets before?
@fossilfellow Nope :(
I had a dog until I was 7 years old, then it died.
The dog we have now is 5 years old now, we got it in 2020
If you get the chance to get another pet one day, what would you get?
@chillmoon I'm sorry to hear that 🙁
I've had all kinda of pets in my childhood.. we almost had a zoo in our house, rabbits ( lot of them ), gunie pigs, fishs, turtles, harmsters , ducks, birds etc, etc- but slowly they all passed away or my parents gave them away during travels.
I think i would probably get a dog. I've never had one of my own <3 I would love to play those disk games with them :))
Or a non-venomous snake xd ( I've heard from a friend they're nice pets to have, and easy to feed )
@fossilfellow now that is something 😂
@fossilfellow your friends have snakes in their house😭. I like the idea of getting a pet snake but I would never 😂
@chillmoon 😂😂 yeah, tbh I'm already planning to search for some shop with snakes in it, I've never touched real one before. my friend also told me that it's a misconception that they're all slimy. They're actually dry and brittle to touch <3 only wet when they're soaked in water
Ehh idk if brittle was the right word.
@fossilfellow I've touched snakes a few times. yes, they are not slimy. actually the scales are smooth.
Your family is okay with the idea of a pet snake 😬
@chillmoon No. lol, I think I'll get one some day in future 😂 when living by myself, hopefully.
@fossilfellow ah yhyh.
@fossilfellow no wayyyy. that sooo cool
Hehe ikr.. :p but it was quite messy to have so many pets, they use to poop a lot xd
@fossilfellow I can imagine 😂
@chillmoon hey, I wanted to check in on you, how r u doing? <3
@fossilfellow Helloo 😊
I'm doing okay. Plan to study for 1 hour today. Did a 5 minute mediation. and walked my dog.
How are you?
@chillmoon I'm doing okay rn, it's sunday so i didn't go gym this morning. 1hr plan is solid. I'll also start small today ❤️
@fossilfellow let's do thiss 💪 (maybe you could start small- like 30 min or smthing)
Yes, I'll set a timer, there's an app called regain, it sometimes helps with blocking distracting apps and stuffs... I think I'll download it.
@fossilfellow oh really? should check it out. I use the app 'screen zen' to block appps
@chillmoon Yep, it's regain is highly recommend, it also has options like you cannot close the screen time if u turn on " strict mode " and stuff.. there's also groups like ppl who r studying on similar field or topic, i haven't looked so much into it m, but it's pretty noice
@fossilfellow
I installed this app called 'minimalist phone' . Now my phone is not tempting. no app icons or anything
@chillmoon we can talk later btw, I'll try to focus on studying rn <3 here for you though when you need to talk, no judgement ❤️
I relapsed today 😣