Please help middle Cs and common dialectical conflicts
This is the question.
Following are common examples of dialectical conflicts. For each conflict, practice the skill MIDDLE Cs to validate opposites and identify middle options. You can write any notes. Here or on a seperate sheet of paper. If a conflict does not seem to apply to your life, imagine how it might in a different situation or for a different person.
1st example self-acceptance versus change:
i have no idea what I'm suppose to be doing. Could someone please explain this to me please.
Walking the Middle Path is a DBT technique that challenges the "either-or" of thinking and replaces it with "both-and" thinking. Rather than going to extremes, it shows that things can have middle ground. This allows us to make compromises, see different perspectives, and come up with win-win scenarios.
Ex: I have a conflict with a friend of where to eat. I want barbeque and he wants sushi.
Either-or thinking: Either he gets what he wants or I get what I want. Only one of us can be happy and if we don't go for barbeque I will hate my friend.
Middle options: What if we went to a hibachi place instead? He can get sushi and I can get teriyaki which I enjoy as well.
Some links for you!
Let me know if you have any additional questions! ^-^
Oh my goodness I just noticed that this is in the BPD Section!
Okay okay this has a LOT more context! Let me describe.
Here's how bpd can work: (reposted from Tumblr)
Me: *goes to friend's house*
Friend: oh btw my other friend is coming over too
My BPD: *banging pots together* SHE HATES YOU SHE HATES YOU SHE HATES YOU SHE HATES YOU
How DBT and Middle-Path Thinking works:
"Well what if she doesn't hate you - is there another reason she could want to have a friend over too?"
The initial extremes were she either likes me and wants to hang out with me only, or she hates me and wants to hang out with other people which is why she invited her other friend.
Here's another link: this one is written by people who have been through DBT not DBT professionals so please use the site with caution.
Here's an article from the site on how DBT can help deal with BPD.
@AdVictoriam thank you that was very helpful.
@AdVictoriam thank you for your help. Though I read all your info I have a better understanding of middle Cs. However I don't understand what the question wants me to do exactly. Perhaps if you Did my example from the question I might understand better what I am suppose to do.
@Melonia
The question doesn't make a whole lot to me either. Here's what I think it's trying to get at.
Take a conflict, and think about what sort of all-or-nothing feelings you might have.
Going back to the bpd example of how I can feel like my friend hates me because she invited someone else to hang out.
Acknowledge the sort of extreme thinking and then ask consider middle-path thinking - what other reasons could she have for wanting to invite another friend?
Does this make sense?
@AdVictoriam thank you for your help. Though I read all your info I have a better understanding of middle Cs. However I don't understand what the question wants me to do exactly. Perhaps if you Did my example from the question I might understand better what I am suppose to do.
@Melonia
Can you retype the question? Im not sure I understand the question
@AdVictoriam here's exactly what I see
Following are common examples of dialectical conflicts. For each conflict, practice the skill MIDDLE Cs to validate opposites and identify middle options. You can write any notes. Here or on a seperate sheet of paper. If a conflict does not seem to apply to your life, imagine how it might in a different situation or for a different person.
self acceptance versus change:
wanting a different life while resisting change:
being the real you versus being vulnerable to others:
structure versus freedom:
novelty versus predictability:
@AdVictoriam here's exactly what I see
Following are common examples of dialectical conflicts. For each conflict, practice the skill MIDDLE Cs to validate opposites and identify middle options. You can write any notes. Here or on a seperate sheet of paper. If a conflict does not seem to apply to your life, imagine how it might in a different situation or for a different person.
self acceptance versus change:
wanting a different life while resisting change:
being the real you versus being vulnerable to others:
structure versus freedom:
novelty versus predictability:
@Melonia
Im sorry I'm not exactly sure what the instructions are asking still... :( I wish I could help more
@AdVictoriam it's ok you did your best. Thank you for all your help :)
Awesome job loving and supporting one another. Keep up the good work. ♡♡♡
