i have to end things with him.
I’ve been talking to this guy for a while
and I’ve become so close with him
more than I’ve ever been with anyone
he tells me it’s okay and he’s so genuine and gentle with me
he’s perfect for me
and I feel so attached like we’re one
and I realized that I have to break things off because it’s not right and I don’t want to let him go
he’s the only person who has ever listened to me
and not looked at me like a sexual object.
We have such a connection and I’m gonna have to throw it all away because it’s just not right
I’ve realize that I can’t go through with it and pursue this desire to be with him so bad ,
he is the only reason I get out of bed every day and actually want to get better
and I can’t have him so I have to end things with him.
My heart hurts so bad I wish I never met him, got his number, and became so close.
He is just my one and only and I have to let him down.
It’s the mature thing to do but I can’t bear it.
i cannot handle it because I really do love him.
He’s for me and I’m for him , but it has to end
and I’m so so sorry and overwhelmed and my heart is breaking. My stomach hurts and I’m crying so hard for him and for me
and all the pain and heartache i’ll have to endure
all because I went to far and allowed myself to try open up and trust again and feel things and feel good
now it’s all falling back on me and I’m ashamed and I hate everything about me. My actions, my thoughts, my feelings.
@conscientiousLion13
It's clear that you and this person have a strong connection. I get why you would be feeling so attached to him. It's natural to feel overwhelmed and heartbroken when you have to let go of someone you love. I think you’re very mature for recognizing that it is not right for you, even if it is painful. 💜
@innateJoy9602 thank u very much i needed to hear that
If he lets you be you and you do the same for him… why should it end? BPD doesn’t make you dangerous or broken. It’s just something to learn to cope with and work around. And that’s okay… if he understands you, he’ll work with you. That’s what partners do.
@conscientiousLion13 only you know what’s right for you. However, sometimes in life seeing what’s really there, what your choices are, and adjusting your expectations can be important areas of growth. It seems like you have an expectation around love with this person, but you are afraid of heartbreak. Only you know if you can build strong enough emotional boundaries to persevere with this person, accepting them as they are, or if you need to cut ties to protect your own heart. We cannot change others - no matter how much we might love them or wish things were different. All we can do is change ourselves - our expectations, our thought processes and our choices. If you can, I would invite you to consider whether you can still be there for your person but without so much invested in him returning your love I’m a particular way. If you can’t - and only you know what you can do - then be kind to them and to yourself. Give yourself all the love and support you need. Do lots of small acts of love for yourself to top yourself us and heal from this very impactful attachment. X