I am in the worst possible situation

@Ansa111

Hi there, sorry that that's happening. 💜 What's been going on with the relationship that you feel like you're ruining it?

Just in terms of general tips or resources for BPD, might be worth looking at some of the links/ideas in this thread to see if anything resonates:
https://www.7cups.com/forum/personalitydisorders/BorderlinePersonalityDisorder_326/ResourcesforBPD_268269/

@Ansa111

Remember you are not your emotions.  You are the person feeling them.

Talk to yourself kindly as you would a good friend.  You are there for yourself always.  Give yourself a hug.