Do You Have A Fear Of Saying Yes? Here's How To Overcome It

"January is a month we often spend reflecting and planning for the next 12 months. Whether 2022 was good or bad for you, the new year feels like another chance to be the best version of yourself. And, sometimes being the best version of yourself means saying “yes”, even when it feels a bit scary.

Of course, boundaries are important and consent even more so. We shouldn’t be saying “yes” to something we really don’t want to do. But some of us have been saying “no” far too much. We are struggling with a “fear of saying yes”.

We procrastinate and turn down opportunities because we don’t feel like we can live up to the expectations of the opportunity. There’s a small voice inside of us, that imposter syndrome, that makes us doubt our ability to handle things.

The “fear of saying yes” – or FOSY for short – may even hold you back from social events. Some of us have residual social anxiety from the pandemic and those long months of lockdown. Then, add to this more practical worries.

What are we usually afraid of when we have fear of saying yes?

Dr Quinn-Cirillo says that any of the following factors may be involved:

• We may have a history of rejection, failure.
• We may fear being judged by others in a negative way ie if we fail/perform badly/don’t execute a task properly
• We may say no if we are feeling we have reached our capacity for what we can manage right now or possibly overwhelmed.
• We may have a baseline of low self-esteem/self-worth.
• We may be cautious- life circumstances such as previous decisions going wrong (financially, career-wise etc)

How can we tackle our fear of saying yes?

• Be kind to yourself and acknowledge that you find it a hard thing to say yes, Dr Quinn-Cirillo advises. It may help to work through the following three steps.
• Try small steps: a smaller thing to say yes to
• Create some space if you can between the request and feeling the need to respond. Put boundaries in such as “can I get back to you” and “let me check how this will work”
• Remember why you want to try/do something – what are the values or meaning behind wanting to try something?

You might also want to experiment with another little word – “maybe” – and see where it gets you."

Read the full article on The Huffington Post

✨Takeaway: We all have a little voice inside of us that doubts our abilities to manage situations. Everyone has fears, but you shouldn't let them prevent you from living life to the fullest. The best way to deal with them is to make an effort to comprehend the source of your fear and how to get past it.

✨Reflection: Do you have a fear of saying yes?

#Fear #Wellbeing #Life #Comfortzone #Self #Motivation #Self-Improvement #Wellness

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