Perfectionists: Lowering Your Standards Can Improve Your Mental Health

“The standards to which perfectionists hold themselves are unrealistic, overly demanding and often impossible to achieve. And when perfectionists fail to achieve perfection? We beat ourselves up with harsh self-criticism and are less able to bounce back and learn from mistakes. We’re also unlikely to celebrate our achievements or take pride in improving on our personal best. To a perfectionist, it’s all or nothing — you can be a winner or you can be an abject, worthless failure, with nothing in between.

Excellencism is a healthy alternative

But there is a healthy alternative to perfectionism. It’s called excellencism — working toward excellence rather than perfection. A term coined by Patrick Gaudreau, professor of psychology at the University of Ottawa, excellencism involves setting high standards but not beating yourself up when you don’t meet them. An excellencist is open to new experiences, takes unique approaches to problem solving and is okay with getting it wrong — as long as they can learn from their mistakes to strive toward excellent achievement.

Excellencism takes the best parts of perfectionism and lets go of the toxic parts. It opens us up rather than shuts us down.

How to be an excellencist

1. Pick one upcoming activity that you tend to get perfectionistic about. It could be personal or work related, or it might be about your appearance.

2. Make a list of what perfect looks like to you

3. Look at the list and pick something that you will allow to be less than perfect. Perhaps it’s just one thing, perhaps it’s several. But pick something that you can really let go of. Just don’t sweat it. Then observe what happens: How did it turn out? How do you feel? How do others feel?”

Read the full article on The Washington Post

✨Takeaway: Excellencist tend to strike the ideal balance between perfectionism and standard. They set their goals high, but yet attainable. They also know when to take a rest!

✨Reflection: Are you a perfectionist?

#Perfectionist #Self #Self-Image #Habits