Thrive Global: Sometimes Self-Care is an Iced Caramel Macchiato
"There was a time in my life when many would have considered me a health freak. I come by it naturally as the daughter of a chiropractor who practiced in the early days of that profession. My dad was a firm believer in taking good care of the body for life.
With the high winds of health and wholeness at my back, I entered my young adult years heavily attuned to acts of caring for my body. I was an early adopter of the gluten- and dairy-free movements. I avoided caffeine. I baked weird birthday cakes out of rice flour and dark, sweet cherry juice. I did cleanses and exercised nearly every day. I watched my sugar intake and occasionally got off of it entirely for months at a time.
Then, my beautiful 20-year-old daughter died. All of my certainty and beliefs were shattered. Nothing mattered anymore. I didn’t care about living and certainly not about taking care of my body. I had promised my son that I wouldn’t hurt myself, but I also wasn’t interested in taking great care of myself.
In the days following her death, a friend bought me an iced caramel macchiato. A perfect combination of thick, sweet caramel swirling on the bottom under a layer of bright, white milk and strong coffee on top. It was a vision, and I sucked it down without any regard for my supposed dairy intolerance. For the next thirty or so minutes, I felt something like happy — a combination of sugar and caffeine, I suppose. But high. A feeling I used to love.
Then, I slowly settled back down into the zone of grief and melancholy that had become my steady state.
The next day, I asked for another caramel macchiato.
And I drank one every day for two years. It was a bright spot in my days. It was a necessary respite from grief. I paid no attention to concerns for my health with all that sugar and caffeine and dairy.
I would learn later that caffeine can help lift grief. This now makes perfect sense to me.
I’m grateful I didn’t chastise myself or moderate my intake. My mind and body needed a boost.
It’s a lesson we can all take to heart these days. In the midst of difficulties, no matter what they might be, stop being hard on yourself. Let yourself have something that makes you happy, even if it’s just for a few minutes. (To be clear, I’m not talking about drugs or illegal substances!)
Be kind to yourself and do what seems the most nurturing and kind to yourself and others in that moment. Offer yourself some compassion. You are hurting. What might help?
Maybe it’s a caramel macchiato."
*Self-care is one of the most important things we can do for ourselves, whether it be times of happiness or grief. There is no wrong time to be kind to ourselves. As the author mentioned, she was always health-conscious and that's okay! But it's also okay to let loose once in a while and enjoy your own version of a caramel macchiato. 💛*
#SelfCare #BeKindtoYourself #Kindness
Read the full article here!
@fruityPond7887 Author seems rather hypocritical - 'I am not referring to drugs, but I used caffeine as part of my self care'.
If someone needs to use a drug as part of their self care, I support that. When I was wrongly told I was essentially in an end of life situation I asked my doctor about one of my medications, hydroxyzine. It was initially prescribed to me for allergies and to this day I still use it when my symptoms are severe, not an every day thing. It is also used for anxiety and as a sleep medication. During that period I was taking it every day to try to help with those things. It didn't make me happy but it probably allowed me to double the amount of sleep I got in a week where I really didn't get much at all.
@AffyAvo i absolutely agree with but i think the author meant unsupervised drug use and abuse, i would imagine they meant illegal and controlled substances
@zealousGrace5023 @fruityPond7887 interesting. I feel like the legal systems end up criminalizing, stigmatizing and dehumanizing people who use drugs. I'd personally still be in solidarity with all drug users / support them. Different people have different needs and I try not to generalize one thing to an entire group of people. ^^
I would have compassion towards the person even if they were not health conscious or perhaps they choose / are in a situation where they can not be health conscious. Just how I feel.
@theriverissinging i agree with you there
people's use of substances tend to be a product of their mental/environmental situation. It's more than understandable and I empathise with them. They also should not be shamed or punished for using but helped. However, in most cases self-medicating is more detrimental than helpful to the person that's consuming them.
@zealousGrace5023 Yes! It's important to get to the root of the issue than just throwing someone in jail. Most jails aren't meant for rehabilitation, but just for punishment and the system needs a lot of reform.
@theriverissinging I agree with you on our system criminalizing many, many people for drug use. I do think that some drugs are different than others, like marijuana compared to say heroin, but that's just my take. People should not be incarcerated for marijuana. It's not the same level as some of these other drugs.
@AffyAvo Yes I completely understand! Medications are there to help us when we need them and we should use them as prescribed, but I agree with @zealousGrace5023 that the author meant illegal drugs! :)
@fruityPond7887
What a profound way of defining and showing us what self care can be. Self care often seems as something you have to put effort and work into but this shows that self care can be as simple as a drink from Starbucks. It’s profound and really fun to think about.
@sunnyWriting4806 I agree! Starbucks was definitely my self-care during the early days of the pandemic and it really helped. It was little, but it broke up the boredom of the quarantine and I really looked forward to it!