Verywellmind - “I Can't Do This Anymore”: What to Do If You Are Experiencing Burnout
“All of us have moments when we say to ourselves, “I can’t do this anymore.” Usually, these are times when you feel exhausted, depleted, overwhelmed, and unable to manage life's stressors.
“In other words, if you're saying to yourself, ‘I can’t do this anymore,’ you might be experiencing the symptoms of burnout.”
“When the words ‘I can’t do this anymore’ pop into your head, you are usually at a place in your life where you feel emotionally, mentally, and physically unable to cope with everyday things.”
“Burnout can happen to anyone at any time but is most commonly experienced by working people, or people in caregiving types of roles (parents, people caring for older relatives).”
“Burnout isn’t the same as feeling generally tired or overwhelmed. Usually, people who are experiencing burnout have been trying their best to keep it together, but then one thing after another piled up, and they just didn’t have the strength to continue.”
“If you are experiencing burnout, you may have gotten to the point where you feel a lack of empathy towards others, and a feeling like you “just don’t care” anymore. You may feel as though nothing you do really matters, and that you are unable to accomplish anything.
“Burnout and feeling like you “can’t do this anymore” can have physical manifestations as well. You may experience headaches, stomachaches, muscle soreness, and altered sleep and eating patterns. Burnout can increase the risk of substance abuse as well, and people who are feeling burnt out may turn to drugs and alcohol for soothing.”
“If you are in a place where you are saying to yourself, ‘I can’t do this anymore,’ you shouldn’t feel that you are less than or inadequate in any way. Often, when someone has reached this point, it’s because there is too much on their plate. The truth is, there’s only so much one person can handle.”
To handle burnout, the American Psychological Association recommends the following:
Mindfulness and meditation: Taking 5 to 10-minute mindfulness breaks during your days can make a huge difference
Exercise: Both cardiovascular exercise and resistance training are effective methods of managing burnout
Maintain strong boundaries: Make a point not to be “on” at all times; unplug from your work during evening and weekends
Build a supporting social circle: Having colleagues to vent to, or other people in your circle who understand what you are going through, can be therapeutic
Consider therapy or counseling: Many therapists specialize in burnout and can help you figure out how to move through this difficult time
My personal take:
Burnout is not fun in the least and I have experienced it myself more than once. Like the article states, when I experienced it, my mental health was in an exhausted place. For myself, this was usually due to being a people pleaser and literally not knowing that I couldn’t say “no” to requests from others. These days, I prioritize boundaries, mindfulness, and meditation
Read the full article here.
#Burnout #Selfcare #Mindfulness
A question for you all: Have you experienced burnout, and if you have, what are some successful ways that you have found to deal with it?
@sereneSunset26 I think I'm currently going through burnout right now. I'm in a transitional period in my life and I'm not enjoying the job I have that I work with kids as much as I thought I would. It's burning me out pretty quickly. I'm just hoping things change in the next few months for me! In the mean time, I'm just trying to practice self-care when I can!
@fruityPond7887
I hope the same for you, honestly! Transitional periods of our lives can be rough for so many reasons. And you're right, sometimes all we can do is stay in the fight via self-care. :)
@sereneSunset26 Thank you! You're absolutely right. I really do think life has a way of working out and we are always where we are supposed to be, even if it's not what we want. We are always learning and growing! 💛
@fruityPond7887
I like that, as long as we are learning and growing, we're moving forward--no matter what. It's staying stagnant, for me, that is a scary feeling 😅.
@sereneSunset26 Yeahhhh I agree. I'm in a time in my life right now where I am not on my planned trajectory as fast as I would like and I'm a little frustrated, but ultimately, it's out of my control and I just have to keep trying and take it a day at a time.
@fruityPond7887
I agree with that. Because I know there are people in my life who simply disagree with the one-day-at-a-time life philosophy because they say it is not conducive to establishing or achieving our goals. But in my life, I would argue that, at least at times, it is. Because we have to keep going on no matter what, everyday. :)
@sereneSunset26
I am definitely experiencing burnout...I found similar articles online and they weren't that helpful. They are basically trying to tell you to stay in the situation, just do different things to change your perception of it. That doesn't work. I would love an article that was honest and says...burnout is tough and sometimes you have to leave the situation and find a better one.
Nothing, aside from quitting, will help my burnout...nothing, I've tried.
@LovelyPlace4774
I feel like I do get where you're coming from.
When I referenced trying not to be a people-pleaser and learning how to say 'no' I can think of a particular situation that may have fallen under the umbrella of quitting.
I was asked to do a public speaking engagement, and I had had some amount of pressure not to turn it down. As it was the type of setting where it is expected that people will accept, and want to accept. However, at that point in my life I had a very good idea of what I was dealing with and I knew that that speaking assignment would be too much.
So, I contacted the individual who asked me and I politely declined. At first, I think I was tempted to feel "bad" for doing so, but shortly thereafter I just felt relief.
Anyway, just relating this experience to you for what it's worth. :)
@sereneSunset26
I am glad you were able to stand up for yourself and tell the person that you declined. I wish there was someone in my job that I could talk to about everything, but sadly there isn't. It has been months and months of negativity and just trying to figure out what I'm doing. I think this is the hardest thing for me. I know how to do the job, but have no idea where to start...specifically because my boss makes it impossible for me to figure this out.
It's hard to say I'm in an impossible situation, but ultimately, I am.
I do appreciate your response. I will, eventually, decide that enough is enough with this job.
@LovelyPlace4774
I am glad you were able to stand up for yourself and tell the person that you declined. I wish there was someone in my job that I could talk to about everything, but sadly there isn't. It has been months and months of negativity and just trying to figure out what I'm doing. I think this is the hardest thing for me. I know how to do the job, but have no idea where to start...specifically because my boss makes it impossible for me to figure this out.
It's hard to say I'm in an impossible situation, but ultimately, I am.
I do appreciate your response. I will, eventually, decide that enough is enough with this job.
I'm sorry that your boss is making things harder on you; I can understand why it is an impossible situation for you. I certainly can understand why you will eventually move on from that job.
@sereneSunset26this is so very important right now. Burnout is serious. I'm experiencing this and I've taken time off work and still have not been able to recover from this burn out. What tools are there or does this mean job hunting? I seriously have to much stress to job hunt.
@carefulBeing1346
Stress and burnout really seem to go hand-in-hand; I do hope your situation resolves either way, and soon. :)
I have experienced burnout and to a certain degree I am experiencing it in my current employment/social life. The "grind" isn't what I want, and what I do want to do, be social as I have recently moved to a new area; I'm overly exhausted when my days off come around, there aren't enough people working my job to give me time off. Then the adult life of paying bills in an expensive area take my extra energy. I want to go back to school and doing this is a way to help me get back into self care. I want to work out but my body is tired from all the physical aspects of my job. I am implementing dance after work a few days a week to relieve stress and adding in some foot soaking time as well. Participation in threads on 7cups helps me as well.
@sereneYellow1926
It sounds like to me that you are remarkably self-aware of your situation. The grind, as you put it, is very real and (I feel) is too often a part of adulthood. It really seems there is a premium on our time as well as energy these days. I wish you luck in pursuing your goals and I commend you for your self-care as well. :)
@sereneSunset26 I seem to experience this a lot. I can’t say I really have a good way to handle it when it happens. I probably get too consumed in the feeling, until I end up depressed. It might take me a couple days to come out of the depression. My husband is pretty good about noticing when I start to be “off”, and he’s pretty good about trying to find solutions to help take off some burden. Unfortunately, most of my burnout is emotional, not actual tasks that he can help with. I think that’s frustrating for him feeling like he can’t help me. Sometimes he says, “Baby, come back to me” and I don’t know why but that snaps me out of that overwhelmed feeling sometimes.
@EmbracingChaos
It sounds like you are definitely self-aware of what you go through; I know from personal experience as well that sitting with feelings (particularly depressive ones) can really wear us out and affect our mood(s).
While I wouldn't say this is a panacea, I have found that mindfulness-based meditation (via guided ones on YouTube) has done wonders for me in both identifying and working my way through feelings. In particular because I was not afforded the luxury growing up of having them.
Anyway, point is is that I feel like I get what you go through, at least to some extent, based on my own personal experiences. :)
@sereneSunset26 I'm experiencing it right now. I'm a med student so there is a lot of stress associated with it. I try to take breaks as much as I can so that I could focus on myself. I take walks everyday which has helped me a ton!
@comfortableNight4463
That's totally understandable, and I am glad you have your outlets of walking to help you in your self-care. :)
@sereneSunset26 Thank you!
@sereneSunset26 Taking an honest to god break
not procrastinating
A genuine break
and then getting to the source of the burnout and changing the habits responsible, mostly changing my perspective around issues and stressors
@zealousGrace5023
All of those are really good, and I am legit impressed that you go to the source of your burnout; I get the feeling that not everyone does that. And like you said, changing our perspective around what stresses us can really be helpful.
@sereneSunset26 thank you!
learned a while back burnout is a little more complicated than just being chronically tired
like in some cases if you treat all stages of your life as transitory while just yearning for the next stage thinking it will miraculously make everything perfect is a common source of unhappiness and emotional distress. Not to mention everything to do to work towards that next stage will feel like a chore even if it used to enjoyable at one point or something you were looking forward to in the previous stage. Just taking a temporary break won't help with feeling run down from that because you're just gonna go back to feeling stuck in this liminal space.
@zealousGrace5023
"like in some cases if you treat all stages of your life as transitory while just yearning for the next stage thinking it will miraculously make everything perfect is a common source of unhappiness and emotional distress. Not to mention everything to do to work towards that next stage will feel like a chore even if it used to enjoyable at one point or something you were looking forward to in the previous stage. Just taking a temporary break won't help with feeling run down from that because you're just gonna go back to feeling stuck in this liminal space."
This is a really great point; I know a lot of people in my life (even been there myself) that feel that if only they had ___________ or were at _________ point in their lives, *then* they could be happy. But yeah, I think there's plenty to be said (that has been said) about enjoying the present moment(s) of our lives.
@sereneSunset26 I've been in that same place
The pursuit for happiness and satisfaction is never ending and completely in that place
@zealousGrace5023
Most definitely.
I know that the destination(s) of our lives matter and are important, but I've found that for me it's been in the journeys where I've learned the most. It's like when I go through a trial/hard time and I get on the other side of it. And it's only then where I feel like I'm able to look back and say "Wow, that kinda sucked, but I also did learn a lot."
yeah absolutely
they both matter but learning happens on the journey
@zealousGrace5023
Most definitely!!
yeah! :)
