Head or Heart?
I've been in a relationship for nearly 25 years now and it has reached the point where we are more mates than anything else. We have two teenage kids.
I've fallen into a thing with a friend who has grown to mean a huge amount to me, I feel I can't keep messing either of them around but I can't afford to leave my partner/kids financially. I hate that money has become the thing that is stopping me finding happiness with this other person who while very understanding about the situation wants me to commit to her before anything serious can develop.
It is tearing me up.
Anyone got any advice. Thanks.
@sociablePapaya7387
Hi--just summarizing what I've understood:
- You've been with the same person for 25 years, but it hasn't felt like a very close relationship for a while.
- At the same time, you have a friend who you're very close with and would like to start a relationship with if you were able to.
- You feel like you need to clarify things and either commit to your current partner or end things and commit to your friend.
- If you were able to, you'd pick the friend over your current partner, but money is a limiting factor.
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I'm not qualified to give advice or say what you should do, but I found a link that has some tips for things to consider before ending a major relationship.
https://www.familyeducation.com/dealing-divorce/relationship-advice-those-considering-divorce
I skimmed through and a few of the tips that jumped out at me were to try to do everything you can to save the relationship before abandoning it, seek couples counseling, and be open to the possibility that maybe the relationship can be saved.