I feel like we're ending

My boyfriend of 7 years and I are at such a weird point in life. I have a career started at a good enough salary for entry level, while he's still doing a "whatever it takes" job for much less money. In our late 20's, he's thinking about getting married and kids, when I haven't even dipped my toes into trying to save to even CONSIDER things like that. His family is extremely needy with tons of their own financial struggles. They owe me money (3.5) but we live with them rent free. I love them to death but I hate how they operate. He's trying new schemes and business ventures, while I'm locking into the company I've been hired with. 

I have stability, a good credit score, a car. All things he doesn't. I find it extremely unattractive that my SO wouldn't be able to support me if something were to happen to me. 

We want to move into a place together, but he doesn't make enough money. I could move into a roommate situation without him, but it's not ideal and wouldn't be as safe. 

He is my best friend, I love him so dearly. I talk to him every day, we laugh, we watch movies, etc. but the biggest stress on our relationship is (surprise) sex. 

I've made a post on here before about it but since then it's just been the same. He feels ugly and unwanted, I have the libido of a door. I'm going to stop hormonal birth control next month in hopes that it helps me. I feel so guilty for not thinking of him the same way he does of me. 

I do worry I've lost some attraction because he is much heavier than he used to be, never smells good, won't shower twice a day like he needs, won't cut his hair short like a traditional man (which I find more attractive - it's currently three times longer than my medium length hair), and doesn't really take much care into his appearance.

Granted, he has told me before that he wishes I was girlier, dressed up, wore fancy underwear, had longer hair, did makeup more etc. but he doesn't mind my weight. I'm an average size.

Would I be mean to bring up these things as issues into why my libido might be lower? Him not being a provider, his family's stress on my life, his appearance and poor hygiene, his poor attitude in stressful situations. 

Are those things just "him"?

I want a partner that is financially stable, that works out regularly, that is calm when faced with issues, isn't extremely sweaty 24/7, smells good, gets regular haircuts, wears clean underwear and socks?? Like am I weird?

Is that a possible reason for my low libido or do you think there's a deeper reason? Am I broken? Am I on too many fake hormones from BC? Help :(