I live with my boyfriend and I think we should break up
We are both currently unemployed because of the pandemic. We have been fighting continually and even though we try to address it, the situation always degrades quickly. I love him but I can't continue to fight like this. We both have agreed that we feel emotionally disregarded but can't seem to come up with a solution. We have been together for almost 3 years and lived together for one. Our lease isn't up for another 4 months and his parents are visiting tomorrow and staying with us for 10 days. I am completely emotionally overwhelmed and drained at the same time. I really don't know how to handle this situation and have hardly slept in weeks.
@fearlessSailboat9539 Sorry to hear that a lot of relationships are ending due to this terrible pandemic its sad but sometimes for the best if things aren't working or your not getting along anymore good luck on your journey with whatever ends up happening.
@fearlessSailboat9539 Just an observation, if you haven't slept well in weeks, it might not be the best time to make life-changing decisions. How about focusing on trying to get some really good sleep and then talking to your partner when you feel better?
@fearlessSailboat9539 It's completely fine to feel overwhelmed-- your feelings are completely valid. Don't feel guilty in feeling this way- you have to understand these feelings to know what it feels like to not be overwhelmed.
Sometimes, feelings get complicated when other people are involved; including signifigant others and their families. Ten days is a long time for their family to stay with you, which can add to the feeling of overwhelmed and sleeplessness. When things get really difficult in relationships, it's sometimes easier to walk away rather than sticking through. (I completely get it- I've been with my partner for seven years, living with them for three.)
Personally, when I feel like I'm at a crossroads with my partner, I look within myself and ask myself a few questions:
WHY am I reacting to their responses in this way?
Am I actually mad at my partner or am I projecting my anger at someone?
What can realistically be done so we both feel more supported in the relationship? What does it mean when it can't be realistically done? What are those next steps?
How important is X to me? (X= whatever you are fighting about)
I hope that this can help you.
However, if you want to leave because you think it's the best thing for you to do for yourself and your mental well-being, then that's something you gotta do.