Is he Grieving?(part 1)
Hi there, I hope I'm able to get advice. My ex broke up with me about 2 weeks ago, we spoke online for a while when he was with his ex girlfriend and I sort of helped him with that and we spoke on and off for a few weeks until we decided to meet in 2013. When we met we became quite close and started going together, during the relationship we had a lot of little arguements but we would make up, it was mostly him annoying me and me getting too angry. We would suggest breaking up but It wouldn't come to anything. Last month he lost his pet of 6 years, it was roughly around this time where he said he didn't love me anymore, he wouldn't want to stay at my house, we both have mental illnesses and a lot started to change in his life, it became that he wanted to take things slow and see how it goes, then I got really angry and upset because it was changing a lot in my life too, going from 3years of together almost every day to only seeing each other a day or 2, I apologised for letting this get to me and I didn't mean the things I said but he started to panic so he took a few hours to think. After they few hours he said he wanted to break up, said we haven't gotten on for a long time, we don't have anything in common and things weren't working for him, I don't understand how it lasted 3 years if we didn't get on or didn't have anything in common, at this point he still liked me but wanted a week of no contact, I gave him the week, we started talking and he said he didn't miss me....
Part 2; he said he didn't miss me and didn't like me more than a friend anymore and the break up was final, I've tried my best to give him space but I'm still in love with him, we are still friends and talking but he doesn't want a relationship, he said the breakup was a sudden thought, he wants to be alone and talk to other people, he doesn't feel anything towards the breakup, is he just grieving, everything got to much and he's pushing me away? or does he truly not want to be with me? I always ask questions but Sometimes I feel like I don't word them well, hopefully you can help, thank you!
@yellowJackfruit7490 he may be grieving, but my personal opinion if it was a sporadic break up as he says it was, he would've second guessed himself and attempted to make things work considering the history and love you guys have for each other. The fact that he has made a decision and stuck to his guns gives me the idea that he may have been contemplating this for awhile. It hurts like hell going through a breakup, I know because I'm going through one as we speak. But as much as I wanna fight, scream, tussle (metaphorically speaking) with her over this matter, I have to let her go so that she can make the decision on her own. You gotta let him go, so that he can see what life is like without you and determine whether life is better with our without you. It's gonna hurt! You are gonna go through withdrawals, but it's necessary because if you continue to push, you will ultimately push him away. Hope I helped and I truly hope you feel better. Know that others are with you in this pain, I am as well.
@CarpeD905 he didn't want to make things work after the break up, when I asked him he said the break up was a sudden thought and he wanted the week without talking afterwards, when he first told me he didn't love me anymore he wanted to take things slow as he still kind of liked me then he suddenly wanted to break up and not talk for the week, I think everything got too much and too quick for him and im trying my best to give him space and not push him away but it annoys me not knowing what's happening if he still wants to be friends, thanks for the advice
