Marriage struggles lies
Hello, please bare with me as this is a long story and I dont know if what I feel is right or I am over reacting. I am at a point where I feel like I have to leave my husband not because I want to but because I can't keep being hurt or feeling this way. My husband lies, alot, about everything. I have caught him messaging women before, sending photos of himself riding and when I asked about them he said its nothing, I felt like it was more like his trying to boost his ego. He again messaged another girl trying to meet up with her for a ride and deleted the messages so I wouldnt find out. even after talking to him about this and saying I wouldn't be comfortable if he was to meet with women for a solo ride. I approached him about this and it turned into me being crazy and he doesn't have to tell me because I have nothing to worry about, on this same day he had already lied about leaving work early and going on a ride with whoever to a cafe.... 2 weeks after this he goes away for the weekend with one of his friends to end up messaging me saying his campsites closed and would I mind if he goes and stays at some girls hotel room. I had again tried talking to him about how this made me feel for him to call me crazy again and not speak for 3 weeks, not one word, didn't help me with Christmas for the kids, didn't help with food for Christmas absolutely nothing. I still looked after him, cooked his dinner, done his clothes, even though he didn't help once, not with anything.
@HoneyP82
I am so sorry you are going through this pain. You are right about all the flags regarding his behaviour. In today's world, some people manage to convince themselves that unless physical sex is involved, emotional attachments or affairs are "nothing". That is not true. Emotional affairs are also cheating. To top it all, he punishes you with the silent treatment and refusal to share family duties.
Unfortunately, he is the only one who can choose a different path from his current one and we cannot change or control his behaviour. You have already multiple times expressed to him how it makes you feel, but it seems he does not want to change.
With children in the picture, it can be more difficult to come to drastic decisions. Do reach out to trusted family and friends at this difficult time for support. We are here for you, feel free to share or vent anytime as you process everything that's going on.
All the best!
@0m thankyou, I actually started to think its me and maybe I am over reacting. I started to think maybe I am crazy. He has always let me down and made it so I can't trust him.
@HoneyP82
Hey ! I am feeling sad for you , this ain't fair no one should be doing this towards his partner I am sorry to hear that . Will be straight forward , kick that mf a$$ , He doesn't worth your time , energy love and affection. If a man lacks truthfullness towards his partner then he ain't man. Kick him away , don't let someone mess with your inner peace. Don't suffer because of a person who failed to practice self control. Leave him let him realise your value and suffer alone.
@SkullCrusher1989 thankyou, as I said I actually started thinking it might be me, but like you said truthfulness, that is something I never get, even if it is for the smallest thing, he lies. I dont get it. And he thinks he has my back, and is good to me. I actually believed that too
