Should I Divorce ???

@SilentContemplater25

There is only one person that can make that determination, and answer your question. You. Nobody knows you or your marriage the way that you do. Even your spouse has a different viewpoint than yours, while similar, differs depending on their own perception and interpretation of what it means to be married to one another.

Let's explore the reasons why you're likely feeling stuck.

You said, "I married my husband young, I'm still young." There can be consequences for marrying young, which is the underlying premise of why you've stated this in your posting. Many couples who marry young, are not fully developed into adulthood or have enough life experience. This is why divorce rates are relatively higher for people who marry young, divorce early.

You grew apart. This can sometimes happen when one or both of you get too busy with other aspects of your life and your time is spent focusing less on one another and more on various activities. When couples forget to work on the small and meaningful activities that bring happiness. Little things performed often, add up to mean a lot between you.

This can also happen from a younger age into adulthood, as you've stated, "six years have passed and I feel like I'm growing into a different person than when I met him...," which is very valid because that is how people evolve and change over time. Typically, those critical six years (prime) are adjusted by going through a few relationships, but in your case, you were committed to the same person. He has likely changed too. Either you both evolve together, maintaining the bond, or as in your case, if that bond is not cultivated and encouraged then it dissipates, much like you've seen.

Now with some life experience behind you, a six-year relationship, you're realizing what some young adults figure out by dating which is what they do and does not want in a long-term relationship. In some ways, you could see this relationship you've been in as a "starter" relationship, training you for a more mature relationship down the road.

You've said, "...but I've grown to not like him as much. I still love and care for him and don't want to hurt his feelings." This tells me that you love him, a deep kind of love, and perhaps even admiration for him sticking through it for six years (because that IS an accomplishment), but you're not IN-LOVE. That can be for a number of variables, but likely from what I've stated above as the root cause.

And you don't want to, "hurt his feelings," but you're not in love with him, you're thinking he isn't what you need or want anymore, and you're stuck and considering moving on.

Well.

When you took your vows, perhaps you were too young to understand the level of commitment saying, "I do" meant at that time. You didn't know or realize what level of maturity the action would require, and didn't see how things might change from where they were at that moment of the ring sliding onto your finger to today, where you're having doubts. Things have degraded within your marriage to the point to where you're considering jumping ship, but from what you've written it seems you feel a bit guilty doing so because it appears selfish and self-serving.

Perhaps a pathway would be to sit him down and discuss what you feel, what you think, and if the situation between you is repairable. If you're not keen on that idea, then perhaps it is time to let things go. If that is the case, always be upfront, honest with him, and aim to be as reasonable and open as possible about your intentions. You've said that he's a "nice guy", worked with you throughout your depression and anxiety, and has been there for you. No doubt, this man has stuck with you through six years and deserves some respect as such. He deserves your honesty and ability to properly mentally and emotionally prepare for what is coming next in the chapter that was your marriage.

When you both sit down and talk about the marriage, perhaps you may discover that he might share some of your feelings too. So, if there is a separation, it may be more mutual than you'd first thought. The only way you'll know is by having a hard conversation with him, because that is the right thing to do, talking to your partner.

If he wants to work things out, you'll have to determine is that is amicable for you to try or not. You'll need to determine if falling in love all over again is possible after six-years, or if you've made a decision that this is finished and you wish to explore more What-Ifs.

So, becoming "unstuck" likely would mean that you come clean with what you've been thinking and feeling about your marriage with your partner and see what next steps need to be for the both of you. It's a mutual decision, right?

However, things shouldn't just drag on, end in a stalemate, or misery ensues because neither of you can come to an agreement or compromise. Therefore, stay aware of a reasonable timeframe for discussions, actions, and decisions.

Best of Luck, no matter where your journey takes you both next -- together, or not.