Together 9 years, now he

@Cglobal

Hey there, hopefully you are doing well. There's a few things I would like to point out;

Myself and my ex were together for 9 years. We talked about some issues we were having a few weeks ago (we planned to go traveling in sept but now he wants to progress in his career and didnt want to travel but I have already compromised twice by pushing traveling two years, once for his masters and second so he could get a years experience in his field). (I can understand if it happened once, like the compromise would have definetly been good, but the way he changed his mind the second time tells me something changed. I do feel he is putting all of this as a wall or an excuse to not travel) I thought we had talked through it and he was happy to travel for a year and come back and progress his career. (His career or aspirations seems to be more of his focus, which often will make you feel neglected) I then found messages on his phone 2 weeks later from a girl he met on a night out with his new work friends. (This right here played a role in him staying, so now there's two roadblocks for him not wanting to travel) He was planning to meet her in her hotel room later that night but she decided no because she had to be up early. (This behavior is unacceptable, he lacks integrity and honest. He made excuses not travel with you, but had the "motivation" to spend quality time with a woman he just met?. This tells me he has checked out of the relationship, and looking around) I pulled him up on the texts and we are now on a break. I dont know how I can trust him again but this was so out of character, (I don't blame you for feeling this way, his behavior is not a good one. He could had committed cheating there on the spot without thinking how this would make you feel) I trusted him 1000% before this incident and I still dont understand how the same person Ive been with for 9 years could be the same person who did this. )Its completly understandable how you feel. Its hard to grasp or comprehend the way he is behaving now when he has not done any of this for the past 9 years) He has apologized and feels a lot of regret and knows he has been selfish and wants to still be with me.(This is nice and all, but if you take him back without boundaries or making him work extremely hard to get you back then he will do this again. Quite honestly? I dont think he is worth it) Ive decided we both need a few months apart to think things through (I think what lead to this decision was fear of being alone, when deep down what you wanted was to end it) but I need some advice on whether or not I can trust him again and how could we regain that trust? (He went behind your back to attempt on meeting a woman in a hotel, put his career first 100 percent of the time, and didn't keep his word to spend time with you. The decision is yours, but he has showned through his action that at this moment he can't be trusted with his words and actions) Because I still love him and want to be with him.