We started a life together, but find it about to be turned upside down
So we have been together for 7+ years... started our lifes together. Bought a house together without any family or friends around, got a dog and had really settled down.. but we now are deciding to separate. I just really dont know what to do now. Niether one of us can afford the house alone. Im going through a really hard time with work and dont think I could afford an apartment at this point. We both kinda came to the realization that we were super stagnant lately, and just felt like really good friends. Its just really hard cause weve worked so hard to get where we are... I mean we bought the house together and are super proud that we did at a younger age. I just guess the next move is to move out and sell the place.... which breaks my heart things didnt work out.
@Bopgunn
Have you tried to save your relationship? Counseling? I ask because 7 years is a long time, and if you are really good friends (a must for a relationship to last) and nothing is really broken, maybe you each just need to figure out what you want and decide if you can get there together vs. apart.
Would it be possible for you to spend some time apart before making a big decision? Stay with friends/family for awhile and see if you feel better or worse about splitting up?
@Bopgunn
2 questions:
1) Is there still a possibility of saving the relationship? As in, is there still feelings from both sides?
A: If there is, is only a matter of "lightening the spark" again. Every couple is different, but isolate yourselves from any technology, start having long talks again as friends, and then see how it goes.
If not, (and this is my second question) 2) if you guys are friends you can still work together! Support each other to find other methods to get money, two minds work better than one! Also it means there's no hurry in selling the house, you can take more time
@Booklover95 I think this is great advice, I'm going to try this with my fiance and hope for the best.
things have been really calm and kind of mutual lately whith everything between us. we feel things havent really hit us yet, or might not seem real yet. I know we both still love each other, but maybe just not romantically any more is what it feels,
but still living together has made it kinda awkward, but also super helpful to me.. as they say, bad news never had good timing, but my dad also just started kemo.. and has been really hard these past couple weeks.. but she has been super supportive threw it for me and my family... which means the world. I have also been struggling with jobs and what not, where she has also been able to support me still, always giving advise.
Trying to spend time living apart is tough, not much for family or friends too close by stay for a while with out makeing a super long, impractical, commute to work. But weve been brainstorming how we should move on. =\
