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i don't know what to do.

User Profile: jessicajess
jessicajess April 26th, 2016
i'm a girl who broke up with my girlfriend last sunday.
we met in social media and she asked me out. of course, we were in distance relationship. we were only being together for 8 months but i love her so much. unfortunately, last sunday, she left me for the second time. the first time she left me is on february. but a day after she left, she cameback to me.
we had a problem before she left me. she becomes busy these days and it kills me to not talking with her all day long. so i had so many thoughts in my head. i started to be in bad mood all day. but she never said this bothers her. we even solved this problem on saturday. we talked about our feelings and she said her feelings didn't change. nothing changed. so i shouldn't be worry. i trust her. we talked about our problem and it solved. she even said : ' i'm staying no matter what happens, no matter what you say, i'm yours, i'm here. ' what the meaning of these words if she left me at the end.
we didn't talk a lot after had a lovely day together. and she left me with a letter that she posted on our account. she wrote the reasons why she wants to break up with me. she said, it's tiring to be with someone who always in bad mood. she said she started to avoiding me for days because it's tiring. she said, she has a crush to someone in her class. she ended up blocked me everywhere. i can't find her anywhere.
i'm so depressed right now. i don't know what to do. everything reminds me of her. i have no appetite to eat. i just want to lay on my bed all day long. i cry every night. i can't sleep properly because i see her even in my dreams. i tried to reach her, with every accounts that i have. i tried to call her but, i don't know if she even blocked my number as well. i just feel like i can't do this. it hurts. it really hurts.
i hope someone can help me. thank you so much.
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User Profile: BestIcanbe
BestIcanbe April 27th, 2016

@jessicaleony

Oh sweetheart, I wish I could mend your broken heart, but sadly I can't. All I can do is reassure you that the pain will ease in time - you'll move on. I know it doesn't feel like that now though, and I'm sorry your hurting.

You sound like you've felt insecure in the relationship, and I wonder how you can address this in the future, as you say this has affected your mood. Remember, you deserve happiness in your life, you are equal to anyone and everyone, you are a unique and special individual - be proud of who you are ❤️

I understand the temptation right now is to try and make contact with her, to mend the relationship. But she sounds like she's moved on. Try and do something that makes you happy. Connect with friends, treat yourself gently, pamper yourself. You too will move on from this in time. Take good care of you in the meantime.

3 replies
User Profile: jessicajess
jessicajess OP April 27th, 2016

@BestIcanbe

hey, thank you so much for taking time to read my post.

yeah, i easily feel scared and having bad thoughts in the end. and this affects my mood. i never knew this is a problem for her since she always said that's okay, she understands it's out of my control. i could change this bad habbit of mine if she told me about this. eventhough it would be hard, i would do everything to stay with her.

most of my friends keep telling me to move on, i don't deserve her. but it doesn't help. they ended up don't reply my message because i don't know. maybe i'm too annoying talking about this all the time? i really need support right now but i don't know what to do. it's stupid but i'm still hoping she will come back to me, she will give me a chance to be with her again.

thank you so much for your support.

2 replies
User Profile: BestIcanbe
BestIcanbe April 27th, 2016

@jessicaleony

I remember that sense of hanging on for someone, desperately hoping they'll change their mind. And yes, you can do that - there's always a slim hope isn't there? But if she's blocked you from everywhere you used to connect with her, she's not wanting that contact is she?

I'm so sorry you feel so bereft right now, I really am. But relationships will come and go in life. Reflect on the reasons you think this one went wrong. Yes, you've said you had bad moods, but it doesn't sound like she was entirely honest with you about her feelings either. So it's not all down to you, and you do deserve a happy relationship. It will happen.....learn from this, value yourself, try and relax a little, and find joy elsewhere for now xx

1 reply
User Profile: jessicajess
jessicajess OP April 27th, 2016

@BestIcanbe

but she also blocked me everywhere the first time she left me. this is why i'm still hoping she will come back. eventhough it's just a little hope.

i'm trying to be happier to prove her that i can change to be a better person. and prove myself as well. it'll be hard. how to be happy in this kind of situation? how to be happy if the only things i can think about is her, our memories. but i will try my best. i will do all the things i can do.

thank you so much once again. x

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