After grief
Last Friday/Last year,
I made a touch decision to cut a friend out of my life because he not only offered me a covert narcissistic friend out of my life because he just wanted to use me as one of his flying monkeys. This was by taking advantage of my kindness and just dump his dirty laundry on me. He also never put any effort into the friendship. Meanwhile, he is incredibly abusive to my other friends who don't give into his demands. Therefore, I got tired of it.
While I know it's all for the best, I associated with him for three years and because of that, I fee very sad and I felt like crying. Though I know I can't fully tell him how he treated me and it's best to go no contact, I still have a lot of things to say to him. Also, what are other good coping?
Hi @Summershy. I'm sorry that you've had to deal with being in a toxic/abusive situation. It's hard now, but you've definitely made the right decision to cut him out of your life. It's unhealthy for you to put up with his toxicity and unhealthy for him to have his toxic behaviors condoned. As far as coping goes, these things take time to get through, so I'd say be patient with yourself and remember that it's okay to not feel okay, but just know that you will be okay. Talking about this situation to a supportive person in your life may be helpful too, preferably someone who has been in your shoes and has the potential wisdom to help u in overcoming your current struggles. Talking to other people about this can help you to put this whole situation into perspective and understand that what you're currently going through is all but a minor road bump in the grand scheme of your life.
@Akshay1115
1. I have been talking to people who have been in my shoes and they told me that I am doing the right thing in cutting him off.
2. I also talked to a good friend about him on New Year's Eve who didn't allow himself to become one of his flying monkeys. Rather, he said that he spent a lot of time observing his behavior
3. I talked to my counselor about him - right now I am working on setting boundaries with people like him in the future. She and I also agree not to contact him because he's trouble. Instead, get my feelings down. She also told me in the past that I can use art therapy.
However, I was looking for some other coping strategies besides art and journaling that may help let him go. Meditation?
Meditation can be a great coping strategy for sure. It certainly helps to try and clear your mind of any anxieties that you may have, and just be present in your existence. I generally find that finding balance between doing things that make u happy and working towards goals you set for yourself can help you to move on from past toxic relationships. Finding a good balance between working towards your future while still enjoying the present helps to open the mind up to put things in perspective and recognize a past toxic relationship as being insignificant/not something you need to fret over. I guess the most important thing would be to do what works best for you and to try to find your own balance.
@Akshay1115
Thanks for getting back to me and I love meditation
@Summershy
No problem! Glad I could help.