Boyfriend watches/has addition to porn
I no longer have the energy to explain the details of whats going on. this has been a sensitive topic between us for a very rocky 4-5 months. Ive brought it up several times about how bad it hurts me, how getting sexual pleasure from women who are not me feels to me like cheating, how I break down and cry because of the prior existing anxiety of not being enough and having a deep hatred for my appearance. last thing i said was that if hes not willing to try to quit or make it less of a habit, i wanted to end our 2 year relationship because i cant physically or mentally continue dealing with what it does to me as his girlfriend. he really might tell me that pictures of other women are more important to the one by his side. were in the middle of another argument and I have a feeling hes going to tell me that hes not willing to give up this addiction to save our relationship and im really hoping to hear opinions on this particular issue. am I the only one who feels beaten, broken, disrespected, degraded, unimportant because her boyfriend has an addiction to other women? do you disagree with my reactions/feelings? I just need some input.
@shyPineapple1313 It sounds like it matters a lot to you to be with someone who focuses on you instead of getting sexual pleasure from other women, and being with a partner with a porn addiction when you feel insecure about how much they want you adds insult to injury. I'm sorry you're going through this and feel like he's more likely to choose his addiction to porn over you with the chance of him changing seeming slim seeing as its been a few months of continued behavior.
It's important to make decisions with your own best interest in mind even though its difficult to let go of someone you love. It's okay to want to have a partner that is healthy and let go of someone for avoiding changing toxic behavior. You deserve better than to be with a partner who repetitively does something youre deeply uncomfortable with and if he did want to change, he'd need to make that decision for himself. As much as you want to push him to change, chances are he won't unless he wants to. That's a painful reality to accept.
I hope that you figure out what's the best method to go about things soon and find more ways to give yourself the respect and love you deserve. There's freedom in being single and the world is a very big place full of new people and new relationship opportunities. I wish you the best and I hope this helps a bit.