How do you know if you are being overly needy?
I have a long histroy of people leaving my life unexpectedly and without me having an opportunity to say goodbye or to let go very well. I am in a new relationship and I worry all the time about being too clingy, too needy. At the same time I am beingencourage to "express my needs and feelings" more. It is so confusing. How do you know when you are expressing needs appropriately or when you are just being whiny and clinginy?
Thoughts? Feelings? Experiences?
@Aristomachae Hi. Sorry if my English is bad. I think.... it is okay to be overly attached as long as you both makes up a me-time once in awhile. Don't be scared to express your feelings. Your partner would understand you more if you open up a little. If you are having problem expressing in form of verbal, you can always go paper, or texting or drawing.. or anything that can let your thoughts and feelings out.
Dont worried too much, enjoy the moment. :)
@foxheadlady
Thank you! I appreciate the extra courage it takes to share your thoughts when you aren't sure if they will be understood. My problem though is that I have no idea when is sharing too much and when is sharing too little. It is a new relationship and I don't want to just throw all my crazy issues and drama at her, too much too soon.
@Aristomachae
This may not be the most popular opinion, but since I know how it feels to be traumatized by people unexpectedly leaving, I'll give my two cents. Do you think your feelings of being clingy is due to being left or others telling you that you are clingy/feeling like they left due to those reasons? When did you start feeling that you are "too clingy"? Perhaps you are connecting the two, being left and feeling like they left because you are "too clingy". What do you consider too clingy?
I really loath the word "clingy" because everyone has their own interpretation of the word. What seems clingy to you, may be normal for another and vice versa. Do you think that perhaps you feel this way because you have a fear of people leaving? If so, it's hard to say if you're really "too clingy" or you're just not used to feeling safe and secure in a relationship. You could also have developed trust issues and find it hard to express yourself in fear of being a burden.
I really think that you need to reflect if it's really your own paranoia or finding ways of creating healthy boundaries/enjoying your own company. I suspect that you may be too hard on yourself, if your partner is encouraging you to express yourself and your needs.
I hope this helped a little, good luck and take care! 
xx
If you initiate conversations way more than them, if you run to them every time you feel bad, if you run to them for validation, if you're more worried about trying to persuade them to stay over anything else.
