How to move on?
I met him at work, he was my mentor and I didnt know him very well but I liked him, I liked everything about him. We never spoke to each others about our lives, only work. But I always felt like he felt something but I kept ignoring this feeling and I kept saying its all in my head.
Days went by, I never got the guts to say anything to him, it was hard because he was my mentor, so if things didnt go well it would hurt both of us, also I wasn't sure if he felt any type of way towards me and he always gave me more like mixed signals and I never understood what hes trying to say. This also made me not wanting to tell him because I saw that I deserved better than just mixed signals.
I decided to move on to another country, I was going to tell him about how I feel before I travel but I had to back off and stop myself from telling him anything because I told myself if he really cared he would act like he really cares or at least shows me more clear signs but again all he did was sending mixed signals.
For 6 now months now I managed to adapt with the new new changes in my life but I couldnt move on.
I need guidance and help on how to handle this, I feel broken and weak.
@Selcouth96
Hey there, thank you so much for sharing.
I understand that it must've been so tough for you to still have him in your thoughts for 6 months now. It's indeed very hard to keep silent about all your feelings for so long especially when sometimes it feels like the other person might like yiou back but you aren't sure.
To me, it sounds like the reason you haven't been able to move on yet could be that you still haven't got any closure from it. It also feels like lack of communication about your feelings could've been a factor as to why you're still not over it.
It's totally understandable the way you're feeling right now since you've kept silent about your feelings for such a long time.
I feel like you could just let him know in some way that you like him, maybe that could give you some answers or closure but that's totally upto you what you want to do. It's just a suggestion since I don't know what exactly your situation is.
I have some FAQs here that relate to your situation and can help you find a solution.
https://www.7cups.com/qa-relationship-stress-43/how-do-i-know-if-someone-is-interested-in-me-7538/
Hope this helps. Good luck!
@Selcouth96
It seems that for you it was/is much more than just a liking. First of all please try to do honest soul searching and find out if it was/is more than a liking. If you find the answer as "no" then it means you miss his mentoring, maturity, and guidance as probably now you have no one to fulfil that kind of role in your life and you feel that you still need more of similar kind of mentoring. So better try to find another similar kind of mentor, need not be at work itself.
If your answer is "yes" then too you fell in love with his maturity, guidance, and his knowledge. You were/are in awe of all of his qualities and you felt he is the one who compliments your own personality and hence probably the kind of man you need in your life. Maybe you started day dreaming about him helping in things/chores where you feel you need help/support. You determined that he will be a handful in all of that based on your understanding and analysis of his "mentoring". Though it was meant to be a professional mentoring but whenever he might have talked other stuff or given you examples of life etc. you felt comfortable and liked it all. If all of this is true or partly true then you might still need some more time to get over it. Try to focus on "self love", self appreciation, and self confidence. Feel confident that you can be as good as him in some of the areas if you learned and worked hard enough. And focus in areas where you think you are better than him. Accept yourself as you are, love yourself as you are, and have faith that you shall find someone more appropriate for you in due course. Till then keep trying to improve your repertoire. He was meant to be in your life for some reason. Maybe the reason was to guide you in some areas where you needed it. That need has now been fulfilled and now his role in your life is over. Time to cherish all of his good memories and to try to implement in your life whatever you learned from him. However I know moving on is never easy, you will still have to tyr hard. All the best.
PS: Whatever I have suggested for a "yes", most of it can be tried for a "no" as well instead of trying to find a new similar mentor.