I can't move on from my past relationship. How can I get over it?
I was dating a guy on and off for 3 years. He wasn't the best person, cheated on me with most of my then friends, manipulated me, always tried to take advantage of me. I have self harmed for many years, it began a year before we started our relationship. When he found out he would give me things to hurt myself with, even hurt me himself a few times. I had become suicidal at one point, he knew that and weeks later he pressured me into sending him an inappropriate picture, told me "If you don't send it I'll leave you and you need me" so I sent it. I was a minor and he was 19, I didn't know that back then since he claimed he was only a year older than me. We broke up 2 years ago now but he affected me deeply and it feels like he still haunts me. I'm currently in a relationship with another person and I'm happy with them but I can't completely move past my old relationship. There are times I don't want to go outside because I fear I might run into him, and he recently sent me a friend request on Facebook. He is currently in a relationship and I've been angry since I've found out, I don't think it's fair. He seems happy with her while I'm still struggling to be okay because of what happened in our relationship. I thought maybe if we talked about it and he apologized I could finally let go? But I'm scared of him and he's apologized before but it was never sincere, I feel trapped. I had a therapist and I felt okay for a long time until one day it all just changed. I have 2 questions. How can I begin to heal and move on? And was this an abusive relationship? Toxic? Sorry for the long post.
A few more details. He would also touch me inappropriately very often even when I would ask him to stop. The last time I saw him he was touching me and trying to make us have sex, I said no and to stop over and over. He covered my mouth and told me it would all be okay, it luckily didn't go farther because I was able to tell him I was on my period. He stopped and left, that scared me and caused me to finally leave him and never see or speak to him again.
Absolutely that was a very toxic relationship, I'm so glad that you're out of that. He took advantage of the fact that you were very vulnerable, he possibly felt he could handle you like a doll. Now, I think that you can begin to heal starting with delete all the things that you have in common with him. For example, you can also block him on all the social networks. I think you need to forget him, and apologize with yourself. Because you deserve more than that, he's not gonna change. He was soooooo toxic, and he will continue with that. And remember that the things, you can see on internet, it's not always true.
