Need opinions
I've been in a relationship for 4 years with this amazing gal but whenever we hit a rough spot idk what happens to her, she decides to breakup. And within a week or 2 she realizes that she's made a mistake and wants to come back. This has happened thrice now and 2-3 days back she again said that things aren't working out. Now I have no clue what to do
@advait97
Hey there, hopefully you are doing well. There's a few things I would like to point out;
I've been in a relationship for 4 years with this amazing gal but whenever we hit a rough spot idk what happens to her, she decides to breakup. (I wish you have share more information about the argument, but something is going on here thats making her behave this way) And within a week or 2 she realizes that she's made a mistake and wants to come back. (This tells me she is afraid to be alone, gets separation anxiety from losing you, and afraid her unmet needs will stay unmet so she starts wanting you back. )This has happened thrice now and 2-3 days back she again said that things aren't working out. (This indicates she doesn;t feel comfortable, safe, heard, understood and loved) Now I have no clue what to do (I suggest you pay close attention to everything before she starts saying those things, and getting her to talk about why she feels that way)
@freshLight64
Hi, thanks for replying. What I meant by saying rough spots was that there are days in between when we have fights, some are small some are ugly
@advait97
Can you name me all of the reasons you two have fights?
@freshLight64
Generally it was about the fact that she didn't have time for me, she would meet her friends and catchupc on her work but whenever I asked her to meet sheds say she didn't have time. And sometimes in between she would start acting a bit irritated for no reason
@advait97
Generally it was about the fact that she didn't have time for me, (This would probably cause you to feel anxiety, neglected and abandoned. I believe you mentioned this a lot of times, so it caused arguments and then she threaten to breakup each time) she would meet her friends and catchupc on her work (This does communicates she is not seeing you as a priority or willing to make time for you, so this is going to make you feel disconnected. You shouldn't be in a relationship where you are not a priority because it will only hurt you.) but whenever I asked her to meet sheds say she didn't have time. (These are the excuses she is giving, but in reality her interest level is low. She is not treating you properly by not making you a priority) And sometimes in between she would start acting a bit irritated for no reason. (This could be her way to push you away or to make you drop the subject)
@freshLight64
Thanks for your insight. Ya I also realized that being in this relationship is only going to make me feel down and degrade my morale.l, So I have parted ways with her. Now imI just trying to move on and move forward in life