Relationship & Friendship Discussion Question
Good Morning To Our Relationship & Friendship Community!
Hello everyone! I hope you are having a lovely day so far. Please feel free to answer the following:
*When you've been in a relationship with someone, how has that tended to affect your friendships?
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Hello, how are you? 
When I had a relationship I tended to spend all of my free time with my bf. But I learned that this is very wrong, especially when you consider most of the relationships end eventually i.
@Busranurr Hi there! I'm wonderful, thank you for asking! How are you today? I agree with you- I don't think we should spend all of our time with our spouse either and I ended up learing that lesson the hard way a long time ago! Thank you for sharing your thoughts with me and I hope you have a lovely night.
I did a mistake separating the 2 words from each other (friendship and relationship). I guess most of the people go in a relationship because they feel for a person attraction and that 'feeling in love' which make people blind... but hence, here is not any real connection (friendship). This should be the base of any relation between 2 people in my point of view. And after friendship if the other levels of life matches (personality, hobbies, feelings..) than can be called relationship as sth strong. In my previous long distance relationship (LDR) I focused on relationship and I was crazy: we talked every day because we got used to it, not because we really had a point in the conversation, i felt like: this (she) is mine, i have to take her everywhere with me meaning that I prioritized her life above mine, checking my phone every 10 minutes, creating an obsession about her passions her lifestyle her language her studies and when I visited her for a few times I didn't felt good in my skin, in my subconscious I felt so lost that I even starting crying everytime I was there with her, because... recently I realized after separation, that I gave my enery to her life, not to mine. I practically forgot about my hobbies, what makes me happy, I forgot to be myself. So friendship is not only that helps you be yourself and make a relation stronger, but it helps you grow as a person, individually.
Sorry for long phrases. Take care of you all.
@1leaftree Hi there my friend! I loved reading your response. I agree with you- Friendships not only help you grow as an individual but they also should allow you to be yourself- Those are the best kind of frienships in my opinion. Thank you for participating in my post and I hope you are safe and well today.
When I was with my ex, I spent much less time with my friends and I regret it a lot. I wish I had balanced things out to spend quality time with everybody around me.
@herealways27 Hi there! There was once a time where I spent all of my time with my partner instead of being with my friends and I really regretted that too. I agree with you and I wished I had put more of a balance in my life with my partner and friends. Thank you for sharing your thoughts with me and I hope you have a lovely night.
@PeppermintStar0912
*When you've been in a relationship with someone, how has that tended to affect your friendships?
I'm the type of person to compartmentalize my life as much as possible. Family doesn't mix with friends. College friends don't mix with old high school friends. Friends in one circle don't mix with friends with another circle. So it doesn't surprise me that I was the same with in my last relationship. Of course there were exceptions. People from each group have met and know OF each other so my last partner did meet my family and friends. But I don't plan events with multiple groups in mind. Friends don't come on dates, boyfriend doesn't come to friend parties or family events. It did sometimes leave me stressed in the rare event that I felt like I had to choose whether to see one over the other.
@SecretlyMe Hi there my friend! I find it interesting that you compartmentalize things in your life- You are the first person that I've read to do this and it sounds like it can be a good idea! I can see how it would give you stress on the times that you did have to choose between one person or the other though. Thank you for replying to my post and I hope you are safe and well today!
When you've been in a relationship with someone, how has that tended to affect your friendships? - Romantic relationships of mine? None have affected my friendships. Friendships of mine? That's caused some problems. First being when I was really young, I was friends with the autistic kid and all my other friends left me, but that doesn't bother me so much. Now though, me being friends with my friend Dewdrop has made other people who are now my ex-friends, Raven and Freedom, it makes them upset and think of me less. Freedom has described Dewdrop as a, and excuse my language, "fucking bitch" and also called me a "toxic friend". Raven verbally abused Dewdrop, and I accidentally made Raven upset and uncomfortable with the topics that I talk about on a relatively normal basis. Because people are friends with Freedom and Raven, they refuse to be friends with Dewdrop and me, even though they don't even know the full story of what went down, people take their side because they're older than us. It's a stupid thing that's happening and I'm trying to clear up my end of it the best I can, but the only thing that Freedom backs with is that I hurt Raven, the person who hurt my friend so badly that they have trauma over the mention of certain characters and her name, which we have now resorted to calling "bird" just to be cautious with triggers. My mom says that you make online friends to get away from drama, but right now that seems to be the only thing in my friend and I's lives. And this is actually the reason why I joined 7cups in the first place.
@LogyBear Hi there my friend. You seem to be in quite a tough situation with your friends and ex-friends. Drama like that can be very exhausting and frustrating and I hope you can get some relief from this issue soon. I'm happy that you joined 7 Cups and thank you for replying to my post. Have a lovely night.