Am I dramatic?
I’ve (23F) been living with my boyfriend (25M) of 2 years for about 9 months now. The last 6 months I’ve been feeling increasingly lonely, and like we’re drifting closer to roommates. I’ve mentioned this to him several times, stressing the last two times that I’m unhappy with our relationship and won’t continue if things don’t improve. I love him a lot, but we don’t have much quality time with our relationship lately. I’ve been sleeping alone most nights because he plays video games for 8-12+ hours a day/night, usually multiple days in a row (about 5-6 nights a week). When he is in the same room as me, he is just on his phone playing games or watching Youtube.
After talking to him seriously about not getting enough quality time, feeling lonely, and sharing what I need in our relationship, I don’t know what else I can do. I’m wondering if anyone has been in a similar situation, and what you’ve done, or if anyone can offer any advice. Thank you for listening!
@blueSeaglass
You are absolutely not being dramatic.
It's unbelievable that he won't make time for you but spends such long periods of time gaming or on his phone.
You deserve better.
I personally would unplug his play station and make him sleep alone.
He has started to take this relationship for granted
And stopped putting in any effort
You deserve to be happy and heard and to feel desired and wanted
I would get him off his game, a nice dinner maybe and be brutally honest that this won't work for you if things don't dramatically change 💚
@Amanda84 You made me laugh with the unplugging comment😂 Thanks for hearing me out and responding! It’s validating to know I’m not upset at nothing. I like the idea of having dinner and checking in with him.
@blueSeaglass
I genuinely hope it works out for you both and you are happy, I'm glad you laughed , I would low-key unplug it every time or hoover when he's playing 🤣💛
A partner should be excited to spend time with you and catch up.
Do you go out on dates anymore? Have you suggested that or planned something away from home so you can possibly reconnect?
Maybe something else is going on but you deserve real answers.
@ScrabbleBrain We don’t go on dates anymore. And when I’ve brought this up, he says “Ok, plan one and we’ll do it”. We have a long weekend trip coming up in October, so I’m hoping that will be good for us to connect.
I’ve tried asking if anything is wrong, saying he seems distant, etc. but he always reassures me that nothing is wrong, he loves me, and wants to marry me.
@blueSeaglass Something is definitely whether he wants to address it or not. Is he socialising with his friends and family?
Maybe they know something. I hope you get answers
@ScrabbleBrain Yes, he usually games with his friends and seems to talk/catch up with friends and family as he usually does. I’ll try to talk to him again and see if something is up.
@blueSeaglass
There was once a TV show called, "This is Your Life." The show did a narrative on a persons life. Well, you just did the narrative for you own "This is Your Life". If we had a Crystal ball, we could look into your future. Lets jump 10 years into the future. You still have your current life, but lets add 2 children; 2 clones of your husband. In your role as the mother, It will be your responsibility to cook, clean, organize, schedule, reprimand... That is really an important role!
