New here

Just wondering why it is so hard to recover after a bad relationship. Was so happy to get out and be single and hope to meet some one new. Two years later and maybe 15 different dates can not connect with anyone. Maybe my expectations are to high but really just want some one that I can spend the rest of my life with. Ever person I meet I just cant get that mutual attraction and not just physical but mental attraction. I really feel like my last relationship messed me up so much I just can't open up to connect with some one due to the fear another train wreck of a relationship. Not sure there is any real answer but figured I might try talking about it. I'm not a big sharing type person so this is all a alittle new to me.