A Friend in Need of Major Help

Hi, I'm TheSmithGirl.

Recently I got back to talking with a childhood friend of mine. She was telling me about her kids, and then she told me about all the problems she was having with her boyfriend (the father of her 2 very very young children) and his family (where they currently live). She was telling me about the house and how it was infested with mice and roaches, and how she was the only one cleaning. How there was never any food and if there was any food for the kids someone would eat it. Alls they get to eat are sandwiches. How the girls can't go into the backyard to play because theres trash everywhere, and their mower is broke so they can't even mow now. They live in the bad part of a large city so they can't exactly go out for a walk or go to the park either. So they only have a tiny living room to play around in.

Her boyfriend is the only one who works also, the others are getting (I believe she said) well fare checks, or something on the lines of that, for not working. They mentally abuse her into thinking she's the worst parent in the world by not feeding her kids, and are constantly trying to take over the parent position by telling her children what to do and freaking out on her when she tells them she's got it. They also complain all the time about how much noise the kids make (Ones only a year old the other is only probably about 7 months old).

Recently (about a week ago) she called her mother to come get her, literally in tears, because she couldn't take it anymore. I came over towards the end of her visit to spend a few nights with them and take them out and about since her mom's car broke down and she was always at work and school. They had the time of their life when that happened. So much so she didn't want to go back, and spilled so much more stuff to me than just this. I've over heard plenty of the conversations she had with them while I was there.

One of the major things that happened was she was going to head home Saturday, but stayed because her mom has health issues (And she didn't want to go back yet) but we were all set up to go around noon Sunday. After a half hour conversation with her boyfriend about how he didn't like the kids being up that late (it was about 11pm, we had just gotten back from my place which was a half hour away, and the kids fell asleep in my car) and how she was being a bad parent about that. Well about 2 am we are all woken up by banging on the door. There her boyfriend stands, there to take her home right then and there. He even brought his mother with him. Now they live 2 hours away, and he told us he would be there at 8 am the next morning to get them (since she told him I was taking her home and he hates me). And so much more since that.

I guess where I'm getting at is, she desperatly wants to leave, and me and her mom have told her this is abuse. But she's too kind and caring, and she doesn't want to take them away from her father (even though we said he could visit every so often, and she could skype with his family etc.). But she's setting up to leave on Saturday, but she's having major worries and doubts and second thoughts.

I guess i'm looking for advice on this matter? I've been trying (as a person who had 2 sister's in abusive relationships) to get her to leave, and think of the kids, etc. But now since she got back and is thinking of leaving she only sees how much they care, and how their being nice and what not. What can I do for her? She shouldn't stay in that situation. All of us, even her, know this. But what can we do in a time like this. Please help.