Guy friends

@Shrinkingcherry95

Hello, Shrink!

Have you tried finding what kinds of similar interests you have with each guy that you want to be friends with? Perhaps trying to relate to each other on a more friendly level like sharing interests or hobbies could be a good way of relating to each other. What do you feel separates guy friendships from girls? I have more guy friendships because I tend to relate to them and we share interests that guys typically tend to have.

I know it's difficult getting yourself out there and making friends! I wish you the best of luck xx

Thanks for replying, sorry it's taken so long. To be honest I just have real issues trusting guys and I think the difficulties stem from there, I get really paranoid and stuff I hate it, I don't have many friends, but male friends I have two, and even then it's rocky :/

Thanks for replying, sorry it's taken so long. To be honest I just have real issues trusting guys and I think the difficulties stem from there, I get really paranoid and stuff I hate it, I don't have many friends, but male friends I have two, and even then it's rocky :/

Hi @Shrinkingcherry95

You know every girl faces such problems sometime in life because as girls it is really difficult for us to perceive whether a guy wants to be just friends or if he wants something more from this relationship. But you know even guys go through this same problem while talking to girls. I used to have trouble making friends with guys too because I used to imagine them as an entirely different species. If you start to look at guys and girls in the same way, you will realise you are able to relate to many men, just like you relate to women through shared interest and hobbies. Next time you talk to a guy, just think you are talking to a person. And seriously how do you even know he is a guy? I am sure you see him with his pants on! ;) It could very well be a girl with short hair in jeans :D

PS this will help you make good friends but this may not be a really good way to meet your boyfriend :p

@Shrinkingcherry95

Hi there, I totally understand where you are coming from. I struggle with the same issue. Knowing what a guys intentions are have always been difficult for me and I am generally intenting for a friendship but things get foggy. After some time I realized that if I approach them as only wanting a friendship, the stress slips away for I'm not trying to impress them otherwise. I just tried being myself as I would when making a girl friend and if they weren't accepting then I thought it best not to waste my time. Friendships with boys can be difficult but keep your head up! It will work out in due time :)

So there is this guy I met in September I made it clear I only wanted to be friends. December came around and he told me he like liked me. I rejected him at the time because I didn't want a boyfriend and I was recovering a bad relationship. So my guy friend and I move past it and we are still great friends. April comes around I ask him to prom to go as friends. We have a blast. After prom he told me he loved me and I told him I love you too. It's July now and I like him but I want to wait a year to tell him to know if my feelings for him are for sure. Like what if it is a phase? when he told me he loved me did he mean it mean it or was it a friend thing? Am I sure I like him? He is in Oregon so do I like him or am I just missing my friend?

@Shrinkingcherry95

I understand what you're going through, I used to be the same way around guys! What I would suggest is to think of guys in the same way you think of girls. Finding guy friends might be slightly more challenging but it helps to imagine them in the same way as you would a girl friendship. Guys are surprisingly very relatable and aren't that different from girls! Once you start treating guys in the same regard you would a girl, you might see that you are making friends easier! I wish you luck in gaining some guy friends. Leave all preconceptions at the door and just be who you genuinely are!

Hope everything turns out for the best!