How do I stick with a break?
I've recently decided to take a break from my best friend and another friend that I'm close to. My best friend has been a very difficult mix of someone who constantly says he wants to support me (and has been very supportive), yet it feels like he often invalidates my feelings, accuses me of not giving him enough attention, and makes me responsible for his emotions to the extent that he will drag me out for 2-hour long fights at 3am and accuse me of being a bad friend and then tell me he just feels sad. My other friend has picked up a habit during quarantine where should would come to my apartment to hang out, but then from 2am to even past 6am at times have fights with me and insist that she hates people. There was even this one time where I just tried to go to sleep (lay down in my bed) and she still attempted to argue with me. Half the time she says she doesn't remember these incidents because we had drank the night before. I know everyone has their flaws and it's hard for me to not want to help them. However, after speaking to a great listener here she helped me understand that we need boundaries, that this situation is out have hand, and that it's not my responsibility to fix it. What have your experiences been with taking a break from your friends and how did you know when to end it? What did you expect from your friends?
i decided to take a break from a long 15 year friendship because she wasn’t treating me the way i knew i deserved to be treated. you have to remind yourself that if you spend alllll this energy on one person, trying to make them they way you wish they were, you will have no energy left for yourself. you deserve friends who will be there for you and treat you the way you treat your friends. you deserve a friend like you, and you will find that friend, but while you’re so busy holding onto two dead limbs, you have no room for two alive limbs to grow. let them go, set them down. don’t burn the bridge, but just take time for yourself. to grow personally and mentally, i feel like once you start thinking ‘i should really take a break from this person for my own well being’ that you already know deep down what is best for you right now. this doesn’t mean that you will never speak to them again, it just means that when you get round to speaking to them again, you’ll be a new version of yourself that will be able to handle the situation better and stand firm. i believe in you. it’s hard but you have got this. put your own energy first, work on bettering yourself and making yourself happy to the point where you wont second guess yourself, and who knows, maybe by then youll have a new perspective on the situation. i hope that helped x