Just friends, sigh.
I've been looking for friends who understand me, but with my health issues, emotional issues, and my outlook at things, I know it can be difficult. However in the last 36 hours, I keep running into religious people who keep preaching at me. I have my own spirituality but I not need people pushing Jesus or the bible in my face.
I just want friends who understand that I can change moods quickly, and I mean nothing by it. (I have so many triggers for my emotional issues.) Someone to talk about, cooking, writing/reading, cats, movies/tv, paranormal, music, blogs, or astrology.
I do not want someone with kids, because most of the conversation ends up about them ranting over "jr." Or that they can't sleep because of "jr" or they eventually stop talking altogether because they focus in their kids as most parents should do. (I've had this happen so many times. When I ask them to talk about adult things, I lose them faster.)
I know the anti-kid makes harder to find friends, but I'm sure there are people out there into cats, books, paranormal, cooking, and no kids.
@Rebekahwriter13
Yes, finding decent conversation can be a challenge.
Particularly with social anxiety, I would imagine.
@DavidEss
I used to be very out going and would love to talk to anyone, but I gitvtricked, used, lied to, and hurt
@Rebekahwriter13
I would like to suggest that it isn't so, but actually a lot of party talk is full time image maintenance, rather than meaningful conversation.
But there's no reason why you can't play that game too, if you gain something from it.
@DavidEss
I will not lie, I try not to gossip, and I will not be used or use others
@Rebekahwriter13
I completely agree with you, but then I do pretend when I want a bit of social contact. I guess it's a kind of a trade off.
I do think gossip is one of the great evils, but gossip about soap opera characters is fair game.
@DavidEss
To honest and ironic, most people don't want the brutal truth
@Rebekahwriter13
You are right, there, definitely.
Being sociable involves playing the game. Being over-kind rather than over-truthful (if there is such a thing).
From a social point of view, it's better to remain silent than upset people. And that can be difficult for you, I'm hearing.
@DavidEss
Can't I find friends without walking on glass?
@Rebekahwriter13
Once people get to know you it becomes easier, Rebekah. But at the start there are conventions to follow.
@DavidEss
Like what?
@Rebekahwriter13
I think it's culture specific. Here in the UK it would be
1. The weather
2. East Enders, Coronation St, or some other soap opera
3. The footie (soccer)
In the US I'm not so sure.
So if you want to be part of the social group, then you would find out what they were chatting about, and go and learn about it.
It's certain to feel awkward at first, but people will appreciate your efforts.
How does that sound?
I think it is useful if you know a social group you would like to join!
@DavidEss
It's not about the topics, I'm a very good talker.,
I dont get out much is my biggest issue.
@Rebekahwriter13
Ah, I wonder if that's what prompted me to mention e.g. paltalk to you.
So you are trapped by the ptsd? That's a hard one.
@DavidEss
I'm diagnosed depressed, anxiety and ptsd
@Rebekahwriter13
I'm not sure where ptsd came from- I should have said 'physical and emotional issues '
Sorry.
@DavidEss
Ptsd as right several issues
@Rebekahwriter13 I get parts of this. Do you have Meetup wherever you are? I've found that I might not find people who meet all the boxes but if it's someting (like supernatural) where I could at least find someone with whom I can chat with for a short amount of time.
@ReadBooksDrinkTea the problems with meet up are. . . they are never who they are in picture, and I do not drive
@GhostBunnywhite
Hi there! I'm really sorry, but I deleted your post in accordance with Forum Guideline 2: Unsupportive Content. You can read more about that on the link provided and feel free to reach out if you've got any questions! @Rebekahwriter13
@Rebekahwriter13
Finding great friends is very hard, but I like to think that it's not impossible. I found one of my best friends here on 7cups, where I can be a part of myself that I felt was very neglected. I don't know much about what you really want in a relationship but there are plenty of forums for you to express yourself, and plenty of ways to make friends (7cups and Facebook especially). When you find someone who truly gets you, it will feel liberating, trust me. Hope you get to come out your shell soon :)
@weirdman Finding great friends isn't hard, what is hard is ur standart to pick a great friends..
@GhostBunnywhite It's hard to find friends who understand my mood swings, depression, ptsd, and panic issues
@weirdman I've met a lot of nice people on here. I want someone I can hang out with.
@Rebekahwriter13
I find that talking to people here online to be quite like hanging out in real-life. One of my best friends is a listener I meet on this site.
@weirdman I keep finding scam artist who want itune cards.
@Rebekahwriter13
I'm sorry that you have trouble finding friends online :( Have you tried on this site?
@weirdman
It's hard when I have low wifi and there are no way to private message anyone.
@Rebekahwriter13
I find the group chats tend to have cool people
@weirdman I've tried the chat room several times and i feel ignored or they change the subject.
@Rebekahwriter13
:( I'm sure you can find a listener who can be your friend
@weirdman My last constant listener had to stop due to overload in school work
@Rebekahwriter13
That doesn't mean there is no other listener to help you. My listener and best friend was my third
@weirdman I think i am just going to a therapist first because I keep stabotaging us.
@Rebekahwriter13
It is always good to get help. Stay strong :)
