When did it get so hard to make friends?
Hi! I always joke about this, but it really is true. WHEN DID IT GET SO HARD TO MAKE FRIENDS!?
When I was younger (high school - young twenties) I had an abundence of friends or people to hang out with. There was never a reason for me to be bored. Honestly, I think I spend more time outside of my apartment on any given day than I did being home. I know that as we get older and settle down the number of friends starts to deminition. I expected the friends I had who partied all of the time would separate. I also knew I would lose a few when I came out all those years ago. The thing that gets me is looking at the situation now.
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So here I am encroching on 30, married, back in school for my masters, and working for a govenment agency searching for friends. I like to think that I am a pretty neat person to hang out (maybe not since I just used neat), but it has been the hardest trying to find new people to chat/be friends with. I have tried finding friends at work, but I am significantly younger than most of the people I work with. I can't tell you the last time I went to a pub and met some random person (not that it even interests me at this point in my life). I also tried finding people in some hobby groups online, but I feel like the only thing we have in common is the said hobby.
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So my question is how have most of you met new friends later in life? Is there some trick I haven't learned yet?
@adventureseeker23
Regarding your question:
"WHEN DID IT GET SO HARD TO MAKE FRIENDS!?"
Some people theorize that
recent changes in technology is one cause.
So that is when it became more difficult.
Because of technology, people spend more time alone and on the web. People talk and email less, and msg more. All that makes people lose some social skills and they develop some anti-social behaviors too.
Other theories are that
people don't socialize in public places and organizations like they did in the past (like regular religious attendance). They stay at home instead. The world comes to them due to high bandwidth connections.
Regarding your question:
"So my question is how have most of you met new friends later in life? Is there some trick I haven't learned yet?"
The tricks can be found here in part, which I pasted from my profile page.
LEARN HOW TO MAKE NEW FRIENDS
IN THE 3 FUN PODCASTS BELOW.
Podcast 1 starts out silly about using a spreadsheet, but gets very interesting and covers "How to have find and keep friendships". Lots of great ideas, suggestions, and insights are provided that are proven to work.
Click on the [Minute Listen] blue bar on the web pages.
Each podcast wraps up with "take-aways". I guarantee you will learn surprising new things that will help you in real-life.
Poodcast 1 - Accept The Awkwardness: How To Make Friends 
and keep them
https://www.npr.org/2019/08/15/751479810/make-new-friends-and-keep-the-old
Podcast 2 - When Friendships Change, How To Cope 
https://www.npr.org/2019/08/19/752412010/when-friendship-changes-how-to-cope
Podcast 3 - Men Can Have Better Friendships. Here's How (not just for guys!)
https://www.npr.org/2019/08/19/752412752/men-can-have-better-friendships-heres-how
So the trick is to work at it and have strategies and understand the realities especially as one gets older.
Please forgive any typos above.
