love my best friend don't know what to do

long story short- I'm in my late 20s and met my best friend through work. in the year we've become friends I started falling for her but it's felt different than other times. other times I felt I needed romantic affirmation. this friend is asexual, and us talking about it had me considering my sexuality as well. I found I feel very comfortable with sex completely off the table... I felt even as friends emotions always came first and I liked that.

Well, to fast forward- I lost my job, and she changed jobs. we keep in contact but she's been really busy (not just pretend busy; she's earnestly been working her ass off) and as time goes on I feel more alone and desperate to spend time with her.

a month ago I told her my feelings (unplanned, I was tired and blurted it out) and then immediately felt ashamed and dumb. she hugged and comforted me and said it is totally alright and she still wants to be friends

but my anxiety and depression got the best of me... even knowing she is busy I thought she secretly was put off and started to avoid me. we only hung out for the first time in that month last night. but even when I ask she assures me she doesn't feel awkward at all.

when I saw her last night, it was a group situation so I didn't have much chance to talk to her. I felt even more isolated... but she put her arm around me and said it's okay, then hugged me before I left. but I just couldn't hug her back. I couldn't let myself feel comfortable around her ...